Pictures:

How would you describe the fact that ducks make more and better eggs than chickens?

It's a para-ducks.

355

Why did Fred spend a lot of time looking around the horse stable?

His therapist said his life should be more stable eyes'd.

1099

Why dosn't Andrea like eating old mint candy?

Her one requirement is that they must be in mint condition.

2913

What is a good motto for a sausage company?

We make the best wurst.

1032

What are the great-great grandparents of an ant called?

Ant-cestors.

67

How was the rabbit rewarded for keeping mice out of the garden?

With an increase in celery.

1443

What does a warning label on a large strainer say?

Don't strain yourself.

38

How does the chief groundskeeper raise the flag in front of Yankee Stadium?

He uses his staff.

228

What do you call someone who measures how much status people have?

A statustician

2397

What word describes a great car salesman?

He has car-isma.

1568

Why did the singer stand on a key?

He didn't want to sing off key.

748

Does the Moot Pencil Company make very sharp pencils?

That's a moot point.

1159