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What do you call a large amount of stamps?

A stamp-ede.

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What special symbol weighs more than any other?

The pound.

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What do you call a tree that has apples for a pie, and it's root is shaped like a square?

The square root of pie.

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Why does the world have problems?

Because it is bi-polar.

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Akiva Lane
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What happens to a person whose drinking leads him to committing crimes?

He goes from drinking bars to jail bars.

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What is the thinnest coat?

A coat of paint.

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What did Cynthia say when her dog bit into her rye bread sandwich?

Something is awry!

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Why did Beverly change from being an accountant to a singing teacher?

She found she was very good with in-voices.

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What's the motto of a computer programmer who enjoys programming?

I never metadata I didn't like.

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What happened when the horses ran away from the farm?

It destabilized the farm.

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What is someone who can keep a secret called?

A secretary.

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What paragraph does Ron Desantis add to every contract?

A DeSantis clause.

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