Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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How did Sarah feel about not getting concert tickets to see her favorite band?

She found it dis-concerting.

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Akiva Lane
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What might a person be on if they can't be heard?

On mute.

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Akiva Lane
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How valuable was the motel that Nancy inherited from her uncle?

It was Inn valuable.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the veterinarian know that the horse had a cold?

He heard it straight from the horses mouth.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the difference between a child and Shakespeare?

One is involved with play, and the other is involved with plays.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jerry looked at his legs, how did he know that he was eating too much?

His calves had become cows.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bill lose so much weight?

Whenever he was about to eat - he thought of the word 'weight', and it reminded him to wait.

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Akiva Lane
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Why do chickens tend to have egg-streme political opinions?

Because they don't like being in the middle of the road.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Jack learn to give himself a haircut?

He knew it off the top of his head.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of food does a tight-rope worker try to eat?

A well-balanced diet.

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Akiva Lane
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What is up and down at the same time?

When you go to sleep drunk, and feel down when you wake up with a hangover.

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Akiva Lane
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Why do prophets tell others about their visions?

The prophet motive is to wake people up to the truth.

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