Pictures:

How did Marty respond when his wife accused him of drinking a fifth of whisky?

He pleaded the fifth.

1831

What did the tree do when it felt like just a stick in the mud?

It branched out.

3042

What do you call someone who is driven crazy by the ticking of a clock?

A luna-tick.

409

What do you call a nurse that got caught in the rain without an umbrella?

A wet nurse.

2869

What is not a good season for Rome?

Fall.

670

Why didn't Bill have a good vacation?

By mistake he went to a hostile instead of a hostel.

669

What type of cleaner pushes men away?

Deter gent.

3003

Why are lawyers happy?

Because they're always dealing with parties.

3127

How did we know the Russian musician would be a good match for the ballet dancer?

Because he played the ballet lika.

815

How did the baseball player feel about baseballs that land close to home plate?

He felt they were hitting too close to home.

765

How does Barbie say good morning to Ken?

Good morning, doll-ing.

3348

Why was the young mathematician encouraged when computing the formula of circles?

He was told it was easy as pi.

203