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What does a big fine for drunken driving have in common with English grammar?

Sin tax.

890

What is called if the thumb rules all the other fingers?

A rule of thumb.

711

What Chinese dynasty was known for everyone trying to be the same?

The Sem Ting Dynasty.

1191

Why did Beverly Teak's niece make her feel elderly?

Her niece called her Aunt Teak.

2701

How did Jeff feel when he lost the speech that he was going to give in an hour?

He was speechless.

742

How do you make a waterbed more bouncy?

Use spring water.

3111

What do garbanzo beans have in common with a sedative for chickens?

Chick peace.

2312

Who was the person mistaken for someone's father?

A faux pa

2261

Why did he buy his electric car with a credit card?

Because he knew that the car needed to be charged.

3223

What do you call a scientist whose funding got taken away?

A mad scientist.

133

Who did Yvonne go to in order to take care of her eye tic?

A tic doc.

2232

Why did Arlene bring lipstick and eye shadow to school?

She had a make-up exam.

957