Pictures:

Where are the remnants of Noah's Ark kept?

In the Arkive.

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Why did Beth wear sneakers when she did the wash?

In case the colors would run.

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What kind of carrots are worth their weight in gold?

24 karats.

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Why can't you trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

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Why did the injured man show no emotion for 6 weeks?

He'd broken both his humerus and sternum.

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What was the name of Joe's band, and which instrument did he play?

Band Joe.

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Which city do the inhabitants rarely need an alarm clock?

Waco, Texas

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Why are there so many types of Asian cuisine?

For different woks of life.

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Why did Jay attend traffic court for his illegal Left Turn?

He knew he was right.

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If a person was stranded on a desert island, what color would he find there?

Maroon.

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How was the game between professional football players and prisoners in jail?

It had its pros and cons.

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What happened to the mathematical function that was very tired?

It couldn't function.

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