Pictures:

What name did Mr. and Mrs. Tross have second thoughts about naming their baby boy?

Albert.

2319

Why did the football player like feeling the backs of geese?

He liked the idea of 'touch down'.

2157

How would you describe a woman in trouble, if all you can identify is her dress?

A damsel in this dress.

1124

What did the husband say when he brought his wife flowers?

This bud's for you.

2075

How did the truck driver carrying marble slabs feel when the truck overturned?

He felt like he was losing his marbles.

2927

It's a lap top.

2924

Why was Fred concerned he was making too much noise while sleeping?

Because he slept so soundly.

13

What is Barry the Smurf's nickname?

Blue Barry

2374

Why was the lady afraid to get her head measured at sea?

She was afraid of cap sizing.

190

What do you call a troop of soldiers with long hair?

The hair force.

1659

How did Jeff's friends realize he finished his entire "bucket list" over the weekend?

He looked pail

1464

Why did the mother have sore hands?

She had meta-carpools.

1064