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What happened when Max’s wife asked him to get plums from the grocery store?

He plum forgot.

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What is someone who can keep a secret called?

A secretary.

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What is an airplane that is inherited called?

An heir plane.

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Why is it often difficult to communicate messages to other people?

Because often they begin with a mess.

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What is someone called who tunes the instruments for an opera house?

An opera tunist.

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What did Mount Rushmore look like before it was carved?

Un-presidented.

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Why did Joe, in his new job, feel like the wheels of a car?

He felt tired and under pressure.

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What is the holiest part of the foot?

The sole.

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What happens every year in the universe?

We celebrate its universe-ary.

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Why was Benjy, who was quite large, like a clock?

His nickname was Big Ben.

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Why didn't Arnold answer questions about beans?

Because he didn't know beans about it.

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What do you call a person who makes great bagels and lox?

A lox-smith.

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