Pictures:

What excuse can be used by a person who drinks too much?

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.

610

How do you describe the relationship between an Orthopedist and his patient?

A joint venture.

3159

What is a doctor called that treats conditions caused by ticks?

A tick doc.

2736

What do you call a tree that has apples for a pie, and it's root is shaped like a square?

The square root of pie.

2008

Why was Beverly annoyed at the large window?

Because it was a big pane.

170

What does a piece of paper and a soda without fizz have in common?

They are both flat.

1749

Why was the elephant that lived in Manhattan depressed?

It couldn't find work, so it felt ir-elephant.

3050

Why did Andrea make beautiful drawings?

That's how she drew attention to herself.

1423

Why did Billy ask his father to take a baseball bat and a bird to the baseball game?

Because he liked bat man and robin.

536

Why is the location of the letter 'I' very important in marriage?

It's the difference between 'marriage' and 'mirage', and 'marital arts' and 'martial arts'.

2355

What is it called when you 'burn the midnight oil' to stay awake studying for midterm exams?

Term oil.

3154

Do allergists make a good living?

It's nothing to sneeze at.

243