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Why did the kleptomaniac go to the doctor?

He wanted to know what he could take for his condition.

1654

What are light bulbs that are very heavy called?

Heavy bulbs.

894

Why did the head of the school demand respect?

It was the principle of the thing.

2124

What fruit can't get married quickly?

Cantaloupe.

718

What do you call someone who is perspiring a lot in a sweater?

A sweater in a sweater.

3345

Why did Bill bring a hammer to the party?

He thought it might be useful to break the ice during conversations.

1524

What is Barry the Smurf's nickname?

Blue Barry

2374

What does the sound of ducks and unsound docs have in common?

They are both quacks.

2526

What it it called how a dog laps up water after winning a race?

Victory laps.

3312

What is a store called that sells only items for the left hand?

A second hand store.

714

Why are Persians good forecastors of future events?

Because they can far see (Farsi).

2237

What song is this about?

Hit the road Jack.

2873