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If before marriage a man is incomplete, what is he after he gets married?

He's finished.

396

What's worse than a crazy driver?

Someone who drives you crazy.

3132

What was it called when police arrested the owner of a tie store for suspected illegal activity?

A tirade.

2713

Why is a body of water on the moon crazy?

It's a luna sea.

2909

What happens to a snowman that gets angry?

It has a meltdown.

2090

What kind of scientist studies bubbles?

A fizz-a-cist.

287

How did the smoker, who craved a cigarette, feel when he got to smoke one?

Nicotine in the nick of time.

3137

Why did John feel bad when he stopped dating?

Because he felt out of date.

1863

How did the "Closed" sign read at the smoke shop?

Close...but no cigar!

1792

Why couldn't the pony sing?

Because it was a little hoarse.

533

Why didn't the actor work on Passover?

He couldn't have any roles.

3022

Why did Fred dislike his job using a drill-press?

He found it very boring.

25