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What is a good motto for a sausage company?

We make the best wurst.

1032

Why did Joe find it hard to get a date?

Because his attitudes were dated.

353

What object sounds like it was stolen, and what object sounds like it has seen a lot?

The lute and the saw.

2455

What is a survey about telephone usage called?

A telephone poll.

1236

When Emily was on a diet, what were the slowest days?

The fast days.

2109

Does before come after after, and does after come before before?

Alphabetically yes.

1707

Because Gus was always happy, what was his nickname?

Fungus.

928

Why did Janet eat from a bag of dates when she talked to Joe at work?

She wanted him to ask her for a date.

2042

What do you call a place where you can relax and sort things out?

A re-sort.

142

Why was the telegraph operator very careful when sending the messages in Morse code?

He didn't want to do anything that might cause re-Morse.

2501

How did Bill describe his ability to make great tea?

It's my specialty.

3157

Why did the prophet need glasses?

He was far-sighted.

2030