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Akiva Lane
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Why did Rose like the weekend?

Because the weekdays made her weak, and the weekend made her strong again.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jim went to the seashore at dawn, how did he feel when the early morning mist cleared?

He had liked being in the midst of the mist, and he missed the mist.

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Akiva Lane
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With the rule "I before E except after C', why is the word 'seize' an exception?

Because it is totally made up 'Seize'

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe someone who is no longer centric?

Ex-centric.

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Akiva Lane
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What chess term refers to a marriage that needs to be re-invigorated?

Stalemate.

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Akiva Lane
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What does a watch repairman have in common with turning a wheel left to right?

They are both clock wise.

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Akiva Lane
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What school teaches about tea?

Universi-Tea.

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Akiva Lane
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What song verses appeal to everyone, and where do they teach this?

Uni-verse, taught in a Uni-verse-ity

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Akiva Lane
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What does Leonard Bernstein and copper have in common?

They are both good conductors.

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Shane Ronay
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Which type of make-up remover is used by all genders?

Withdrawing an apology

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Maxine want to charge the lightbulb with a saltwater battery?

She didn't want it to be charged with salt and battery.

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Shane Ronay
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Why did one man leave the card playing group of his wife's friends?

He needed to "de-talks".

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