Pictures:

How does a pipefitter foreman ensure his workers aren't too noisy when on jobsites?

He asks them to pipe down.

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When Mrs. Smith suggested to her husband that they go to a concert, what was his response?

Sounds good.

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Why did this guy think he'd be good at bartending?

He came from a "pour" family.

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Why is the last part of a meal called dessert?

That's when people desert their diet.

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Why did people find this very alarming?

They thought it was egg stream.

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What did the large fan say to the girl holding it?

I'm one of your biggest fans.

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Why do some people choose to do mixed martial arts?

Just for kicks.

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Why are bakery employees so nice to their customers?

They know where their bread is buttered.

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Why did the mother love carry her child?

She started loving it when she carried him before he was born.

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What is another name for a frankfurter and beer?

Frank and stein.

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Why were the angels that were getting married so happy?

It was a marriage made in heaven.

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What is a large pair of glasses called with lots of people looking at it?

A public spectacle.

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