Pictures:

How did Bill's hitch-hiking trip go when nobody gave him a ride?

It went without a hitch.

1711

What do Siamese twins say to each other before dinner?

Would you like to join me before dinner?

2757

What do you call it when the mother and midwife work hard together to give birth to a baby?

A labor union.

105

What happens when parents from Asia spin their children?

They become dis-Oriented

2316

What do you get when you find someone you want to marry?

You get married.

319

What is an arrangement with UPS, Fedex, or DHL to send a package called?

A package deal.

2774

Why did Mrs. Jones put the steaks in the freezer higher than the kids could reach?

Because the steaks were high.

2992

Why was President Clinton elected in between Presidents George H. and George H.W.?

Because a Bill at hand is worth two in the Bush.

279

Why did Bill buy 2 pieces of chord, and gave one to his girlfriend?

He wanted to tie the knot.

1914

Why are jellyfish so mean?

Because they're spineless.

1061

What object sounds like it was stolen, and what object sounds like it has seen a lot?

The lute and the saw.

2455

What is an expert commentator about puns?

A pundit.

1228