Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
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Why was Benjy, who was quite large, like a clock?

His nickname was Big Ben.

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Akiva Lane
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What food made Emily think about what happened in the past?

Pasta.

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Akiva Lane
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What does eating hot food and sneezing have in common?

They are both hot chews.

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Shane Ronay
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What's the proper thing to say to a friend who just bought a fancy new wine cooler?

Cool!

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Akiva Lane
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If before marriage a man is incomplete, what is he after he gets married?

He's finished.

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Shane Ronay
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How did the man who ate nothing but vegetable soup for decades live to be 100?

He took good stock in himself.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Suzy avoid eating peaches?

After eating the fruit, it was the pits.

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Shane Ronay
General
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What did Mount Rushmore look like before it was carved?

Un-presidented.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why did people think the silent owl didn't care about things?

Because it didn't give a hoot.

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Akiva Lane
General
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If a leader doesn't have a clear inspiring vision, what is the result?

Di-vision.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jack felt that his out-house was too dark, how did he feel after he put a large hole on the top of the door to let in light?

I needed that like a hole in the head.

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Akiva Lane
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What do lawyers do?

They insert and remove claws in clauses.

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