Pictures:

How do we know that the ancient Egyptians were not honest?

They were into pyramid schemes.

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What happens to dairy cows when they die?

They get CREAMated.

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How did Fred feel when he opened the cupboard and a glass jar fell on his head?

He found it very jarring.

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Which ethnic food is highest in fiber?

Thai

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When Bill took the hot air balloon, why did he find it hard to concentrate?

Because then his head was in the clouds.

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What postage is similar to a woman giving birth?

Special delivery.

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Why are jellyfish so mean?

Because they're spineless.

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What did Max do when he joined the surfboard team?

He was onboarded.

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What happened to Martha when she fell into the large strainer that she was using?

She strained herself.

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What did the cemetery director say when a man bought one grave, and then another for his wife?

"Hmm...the plot thickens!"

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When Andy gave Meg the engagement ring, what playing card did Meg feel like?

The Queen of Diamonds.

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What did Marty say when he was saved by a lifeguard named Sam Bell?

"I was saved by the Bell".

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