Pictures:

Which career works the fewest hours per week?

A Monday morning quarterback.

1265

Why can you trust an expert in sound systems?

He gives sound advice.

1207

What happened to the man driving with a broken tail pipe?

He became exhausted.

828

What do you call a costume made up of sun, moon, and stars?

The disguise is the skies.

148

How did the inventor of the Jack-In-The-Box come up with invention?

He used out-of-the-box thinking.

426

When Anne's mother suggested that she learn how to play bridge, what was Anne's response?

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

788

What can you learn from watching a pear tree grow?

You can learn more about how to pre-pear.

2705

Why did Olivia put on a hat whenever she wanted to keep a secret?

Because she had to keep the secret under her hat.

1014

What did Alan say about his daughter traveling so much after she won the state's beauty contest?

I miss miss Missouri.

1965

What happens if a cat falls into vinegar?

It becomes a sourpuss.

1725

What happened when Phil decided to do a brain transplant?

He changed his mind.

2068

Why should you take a sharp pencil seriously?

It has a good point.

1762