Pictures:

What does a piece of paper and a soda without fizz have in common?

They are both flat.

1749

Why should we be very careful handling glass?

There's a reason it's called a pain of glass.

1966

What is the hardest thing about making a sidewalk?

The cement.

1660

When Ellie Smith married Darth Vader why did she feel things were going up?

She became Ellie Vader.

1613

Why was Mike concerned about the liquids that he drank?

Because after he drank them, they were drunk.

14

How do you describe a fantastic egg?

Egg-cellent, egg-ceptional, and egg-stroadinary.

2671

What school teaches about tea?

Universi-Tea.

681

What country is named after neck-wear?

Tie Land.

1677

Why is it best to avoid jealousy?

Because it ends with lousy.

1830

Why was Amanda surprised that this perfume was so expensive?

She was told it was worth a red scent.

1376

Why wasn't Joe able to get the bank's low-interest loan?

Because the bank had low interest in giving the loan.

29

Who is not very good at match-making?

Smokey the Bear, because he doesn't like playing with matches.

1378