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What did the mountain climber call his memoire?

Cliff's Notes.

3034

What do you call a crockpot that is broken?

A crackpot.

2580

Why is it best to avoid jealousy?

Because it ends with lousy.

1830

What do you call it when the CIA puts a bugging device in a flower pot in a factory?

A plant in a plant in a plant.

168

Why did the left foot, when it was in back of a person, feel sad?

Because it felt left behind.

2413

How did Elliot's investment in the chicken farm work out?

It took him a while to re-coop his investment.

689

What is the largest bone on hippos?

Their hips.

1065

When you add up numbers, and are amazed at the result, what is that called?

Awe sum.

2197

What has four wheels and flies.

A garbage truck.

510

What kind of arithmetic did Julius Caesar like?

Divide and conquer.

2558

What name for cigarettes describes the harm they do?

Sick-arettes.

289

Why don't they sharpen pencils at both ends?

What's the point?

1687