Pictures:

How were crews asked to stop construction of this specific hospital?

Please hold the Mayo.

791

How did Jim feel when he walked barefoot on seashells at the beach?

He was shell shocked.

2020

Do people in the UK use common sense?

No, the common pence.

283

What happens if you ask your builder not to carpet the steps in your house?

He'll give you a blank stair.

1233

What do you have when you remove the red lines?

love

2918

What is a movie with singing and dancing cows called?

A moo-sical.

3008

Why did Joe race Fred to the punch-bowl at the party?

He wanted to beat him to the punch.

1538

What is the trend called where people take pieces of coal with them on dates?

Carbon dating.

2476

What can you say about a person who as an acute sense of smell?

He nose alot.

3246

Why did the butcher not take down the steaks from the top shelf of his freezer?

Because the steaks were too high.

3203

Why was Achmed the thief unpopular with the other shepherds?

He got other people's goats.

1797

Why should we be careful about illusions?

Because it begins with the word 'ill'.

106