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Shane Ronay
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Why is it that lions get more food than tigers, leopards, and jaguars?

They always get the lion's share

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Akiva Lane
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What is a cane called that a shepherd uses to get animals to move faster?

A hurry cane.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jack felt that his out-house was too dark, how did he feel after he put a large hole on the top of the door to let in light?

I needed that like a hole in the head.

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Akiva Lane
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What do shoes and noses have in common?

They both smell.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Max do when the plumbing company made a mess of trying to fix the bathroom blockage?

He decided to sue her.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Arnold like about geometry?

He thought some of the angles were acute.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jill buy a Jiffy car?

Because she wanted to go places and come back in a jiffy.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened to Bill's plan to see everyone as a 10 out of 10 in all areas?

He found it untenable.

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Akiva Lane
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What would it be called if animals gave birth from their hands?

Pregnant paws.

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Shane Ronay
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What is always the main topic at the annual Surfing Conference?

Current events.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jerry avoid taking hot baths?

He tried to avoid things that would get him into hot water.

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Akiva Lane
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What was Betty's reaction when the recipe called for stirring the batter?

She kept on stirring until she went batty and stir crazy.

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