Pictures:

What do you call a perfect egg?

Egg-selent.

463

Which city do the inhabitants rarely need an alarm clock?

Waco, Texas

421

What US city is named after soft drinks that Sara made?

Sarasota.

1650

What did the doctor use this room for?

A wading room

3169

Why was Fred confused by forms?

Because he didn't know if he should fill them IN or fill them OUT.

1010

How did the young lady feel when her date was rude?

She felt dis-missed.

726

When we feel blessed, why do we feel like singing?

Because the word blessing ends with the word sing.

2762

What arm of the octopus is the strongest?

The Arm E.

2706

What do you call a broken can opener?

A can't opener.

3145

When the teacher gave a surprise quiz, why did he have the students stand on a big circle?

Because they had to remember everything on the spot.

3120

What was the double-jointed acrobat very good at?

Patting himself on the back.

1559

Which paintings are not on display in museums?

Those with no strings attached.

194