Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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When Bill had to choose between a heavy oar and a light oar to use with his kayak, what did he choose?

Either oar.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Trump remove the restrictions on plastic straws?

Because in terms of government intervention, it was the last straw.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe someone who has a lot of influence in the field of app development?

He has app pull.

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Akiva Lane
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What do employment recruiters and cannibals have in common?

They're both called head hunters.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Emma avoid using coins?

She thought they were all two-faced.

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Shane Ronay
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Why was this water making high-pitched noises?

Because it was a creak.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the conversation go between a patient and the doctor who wanted him to cut down on mayonnaise?

Mayonnaise? No you may not.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Marty respond when his wife accused him of drinking a fifth of whisky?

He pleaded the fifth.

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Yitzchak Berger
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What do you call a paper airplane that can't fly?

Stationary.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What can you say about a broken drinking fountain?

It's out of order and out of water.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the lesson of daylight savings time?

If clocks can change, so can we.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Betty so surprised when a blue car drove up and her friend stepped out?

Because it came out of the blue.

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