Pictures:

What do you call someone using a fake stun gun?

A taser teaser

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

853

Why didn't Bill use his photographic memory?

He never developed it.

961

Why did people think the silent owl didn't care about things?

Because it didn't give a hoot.

2416

Why do shoes sneeze when they get hot?

They become hot-shoes!

1552

Why did the clown leave the circus?

Because people were always laughing at him.

2621

What did Max say when the mechanic said he must fix the car brakes?

Those are the breaks.

374

What happened when the computer team's regression tests failed?

Things regressed.

2688

Why are lawyers happy?

Because they're always dealing with parties.

3127

What do you call a veterinarian that used to be in the army?

A vet vet.

1586

Why didn't Betty want to talk about the bed that her dog Dignity was sleeping on?

She felt it was beneath her dignity.

1313

What is one advantage of being indecisive?

Having the benefit of the doubt.

1821