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Akiva Lane
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What did Fred say to the driver of the car that hit his car from the back?

You're a pain in the rear end.

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Akiva Lane
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What excuse can be used by a person who drinks too much?

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.

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Akiva Lane
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What permission did the poet need to write poetry?

Poetic license.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the miner say when he found gold?

It's mine!

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Akiva Lane
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How did Martha feel when she cut her vegetables into very small pieces?

Grate.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the cherry tree say to George Washington?

Don't ax me.

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Akiva Lane
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What do small boats and computers have in common?

They both can be used for fishing using a net.

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Akiva Lane
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Why don't red and blue get along with each other?

They are on different wavelengths.

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Akiva Lane
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What is up and down at the same time?

When you go to sleep drunk, and feel down when you wake up with a hangover.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a cookie with a PhD called?

A smart cookie.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call and aunt that doesn't like people?

Aunt Tipathy

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Moshe Sherizen
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What season is it when you are on a trampoline?

Spring time.

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