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What did Beth answer when Phil asked for a second date?

OK, I'll try a re-Phil.

2407

Which city do the inhabitants rarely need an alarm clock?

Waco, Texas

421

What did Sylvia say when her lunch fell down a well by mistake?

Oh, well.

369

What is it called when two people argue about who won a contest?

They're contesting the contest.

3321

Why did one man leave the card playing group of his wife's friends?

He needed to "de-talks".

506

What can we learn from the fact that the US will no longer be making pennies?

That it no longer has common cents.

3200

Why did the man visit his doctor with such tendency?

He had tendonitis.

1070

Why did Alan quit his job as a probate attorney?

He didn't like putting on heirs.

816

What did the woman do who got sick from the sushi restaurant?

She sued sushi.

3141

Why did Marsha make a knot in the shape of the letter Y?

She figured 'Why not'?

2589

What do you do when you see waves at a beach?

Wave back.

57

How did Emma feel when she had a dream during a nap that she was elected president?

It felt like a power nap.

389