Pictures:

What fruit must get formally married?

Cantaloupe

1664

Why did Andy become a tightrope walker in the circus?

He was told that big money could be made in jobs that are online.

2415

What do you call a thief that leaves no clues?

Stainless steal.

1658

Why was the vegetarian disappointed at the dinner party?

He thought sweetbreads came from a bakery.

754

What is the most important thing to have when sanding wood?

True grit.

1453

Why did Superman's fruit bowl remind him of football?

It was a super bowl.

1928

What did the family photographer say to those posing?

We'll be done in a flash.

257

Why did the magazine publisher go to a therapist?

He had a lot of issues.

2516

What does Arthur wear when he drinks tea?

A t-shirt.

1938

What do forests and clocks have in common?

Ticks.

3299

What is a very good thing about Switzerland?

Their flag is a big plus.

1334

When Andy gave Meg the engagement ring, what playing card did Meg feel like?

The Queen of Diamonds.

772