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Akiva Lane
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When the prices of houses go up, why do their roofs get weaker?

Because the prices go through the roof.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Frank's hitch-hiking trip go?

It went without a hitch.

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Akiva Lane
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What scoring system is used for the sport of curling?

Curl marks.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is Joe doing this?

He was told it was important to push the envelope.

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Akiva Lane
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What is an example of an American war that was not civil?

The Civil War.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe professional athletes?

They are pro-active.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Billy very careful blowing out the candles on his birthday cake?

This was his big birthday party, and he didn't want to blow it.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a retired explorer?

An ex-plorer.

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Akiva Lane
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What does someone say to a friend who he thinks is too optimistic?

You topian!

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Shane Ronay
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What is the official fruit of Florida?

Elderberries

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Beverly learn knot tying?

She wanted to tie the knot, and get married.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Marty know what types of kitchen counters his customers really wanted?

It was always counter-intuitive.

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