Pictures:

Shane Ronay
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What's good advice when photographing celestial beings?

Be sure you get the best angel.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the shine of a gold ring called?

Its ring tone.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Johnny feel when he spent all the pennies in his piggy bank?

It left him cents-less.

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How did the old car feel after Mr. and Mrs. Jones drove it a long distance?

It felt like such a wreck.

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Akiva Lane
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What didn't Alan understand about the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme?

How were the king's horses involved in putting Humpty Dumpty together again?

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Akiva Lane
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What word and number indicate the winner of a race?

Won and 1.

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Akiva Lane
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Why are people who used to be perts very smart?

Because they are ex-perts.

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Akiva Lane
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After Bob broke his leg, why wasn't he able to control his kids?

Because he couldn't put his foot down.

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What is similar between a Japanese couch an ottoman foot rest?

One is a futon, and the other you put your foot on.

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Akiva Lane
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What two letters are used to make a spreadsheet?

XL

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Betty enjoy the Uber ride?

It gave her a lift.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe a documentary that is very funny?

It's historical and hysterical.

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