Pictures:

Why didn't Martha like having pet ducks?

She found they weren't what they were quacked up to be.

2167

How did we know the Russian musician would be a good match for the ballet dancer?

Because he played the ballet lika.

815

What's a good name for a tanning salon?

Tan Fastic.

2720

Why couldn't Melissa figure out Eddie Edwards?

To her, he was Mister E.

2012

What is someone called who is an expert at getting goo off of clothes?

A goo ru.

2863

What is a lawyer's favorite girl's name?

Sue.

428

How did the small piece of wood feel when there was nothing to do?

It was a little board.

51

Which field of study is best for life coaches to major in?

Pathology

755

What happens to dairy cows when they die?

They get CREAMated.

1059

Why did Barry look at his feet when he walked at work?

Because his boss told him he had to watch his step.

400

What was Bill's reaction when he found a hole in the wall of the outhouse?

"I need that like a hole in the head'.

1219

How did Arnold feel about his budget?

He wants to budge it.

120