Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did Heaven say to the angel that put too much dew on the grass?

Don't over dew it.

2019
Shane Ronay
General
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What did the Mayor say about the turnstile jumping on the subway?

That's not fare!

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

How did Jeff's friends realize he finished his entire "bucket list" over the weekend?

He looked pail

1464
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why was Sally afraid that the vegetables would slap her?

Because she knew they were fresh.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

How did the medical student choose Ophthalmology as a specialty?

He researched his options, and the eyes had it.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did the father bring a broken cup to the family meal?

He wanted to play good-cup bad-cup with his kids.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is a cane called that a shepherd uses to get animals to move faster?

A hurry cane.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why do some people like to eat these?

It gives them a peas-ful feeling.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Bob put some salt on everything he ate?

He was told to take everything with a grain of salt.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Can a person who complains all the time be a vegetarian?

No, because he always has a beef.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What did the doctor say to the sick person who was too much in a rush?

I'll be doctor, you be patient.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why should we be careful about illusions?

Because it begins with the word 'ill'.

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