Pictures:

What did the uninitiated tourist think when he visited here?

People were talking to the wall.

638

How is a face similar to a shoe?

They both have a tongue.

2828

What can you take when you want some exercize?

You can take a walk.

505

Why did the factory that made car transmissions have problems?

Because their assembly line was make-shift.

2937

What time is this?

A quarter after 5.

2727

What do cows use for money?

Moolah

2963

What kind of log can't change directions?

An ideologue.

1419

Which business finds emergency replacement musicians?

Band Aid

288

What was the main fruit in Noah's ark?

Pears.

80

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

Because it felt crummy.

962

What is someone called who is always thinking about buildings?

He has an edifice complex.

207

What symbol is written before it is pronounced?

The dollar sign.

515