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What did the mid-wife say to the woman giving birth?

Grin and bear it.

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What is something that we wear that is called by the material that it used to be made from?

Glasses.

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What are people who work for the telephone company in Poland called?

Telephone Poles.

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What does the sound of ducks and unsound docs have in common?

They are both quacks.

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What part of a car is similar to these wooden dashes?

The dashboard.

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Does this letter want to wait?

No, it's ready.

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What does a big fine for drunken driving have in common with English grammar?

Sin tax.

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How do you describe a water dispenser that is broken?

It's out of order, and it's out of water.

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Where are the remnants of Noah's Ark kept?

In the Arkive.

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How did Sam feel when he left the Far East?

He felt dis-oriented.

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How does a skunk know how to release its smell?

It uses its in-stinked.

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Why didn't Arnie like downhill skiing?

He wasn't inclined to enjoy that kind of activity.

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