Pictures:

How did the "Closed" sign read at the smoke shop?

Close...but no cigar!

1792

How did Jim feel when he thought he was losing his marbles?

He felt marble-less.

2998

What kind of doctor is similar to a boring teacher?

An anesthesiologiest - they both put people to sleep.

837

What is it called when someone had a good date, and tells you about it?

An update.

2186

The order of what 2 syllables makes the difference between happy and sad?

Being upbeat is better than being beat up.

1620

What is another name for a car's complete history?

An autobiography.

173

How would you describe Shakespeare's development as a writer?

It went through many stages.

3123

Why did the laptop catch a cold?

Because Windows was left open.

2348

What is common with the words Human and Humor?

They both begin with a focus on the word 'You'.

1041

Why did Jim eat steak when he was investing in companies?

Because he wanted a stake in the companies.

1417

What is similar between a worn out tire and getting social security?

It may be time to retire.

3143

What is the letter O called when it acts strange?

A weirdo.

2547