Pictures:

What do you call a nurse that got caught in the rain without an umbrella?

A wet nurse.

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What happens when a person sleeps on old magazines?

He has back issues.

595

How did Jack learn to give himself a haircut?

He knew it off the top of his head.

2127

During an uprising, what are random groups of armed men called?

Malicious militias.

822

What 2 letters do you use when talking to someone else about themselves?

UR

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What is this pitcher doing?

He's pitching a tent.

2860

What does a snake say when it bites?

Don't take it poisonally.

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What did Joey do when his mother said his bathroom towel was dirty, and he should throw it in the hamper?

He threw in the towel.

1386

Where do fish learn what they know?

In schools of fish.

1983

Why don't gluten-free people consume wheat?

It goes against their grain.

436

Why was the hot dog happy?

Because it was on a roll.

208

What is the annual football game for plumbers?

The Toilet Bowl.

1346