Pictures:

What did Barbie say to Ken?

You're a doll.

1823

How did the pet turtle escape from the box it was in?

With out of the box thinking.

3213

How did Matt feel about the government diverting the river that made his stream dry up?

He thought it was ex-stream.

102

What do you call a hyphen that is the size of a football field?

A hundred yard dash.

135

What did the sheep say to his friend who had been sheared?

Boy did you get fleeced.

1137

Why do violinists put rosin on their violin bows?

It makes the violins rosin-ate.

760

What did the clock repairman say when you asked when the talking clock will be fixed?

Time will tell.

2321

The order of what 2 syllables makes the difference between happy and sad?

Being upbeat is better than being beat up.

1620

What was Jim's reaction when the other poker player wanted to deal the cards?

Well, it's not ideal.

1765

How did they describe the situation where the band's bass players were drunk?

The basses were loaded.

446

Who represents the National Bicycle Tire Association?

Their spokesman

3208

How did the lawyers refer to the case of the pillow company being sued?

The pillow case.

1825