Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do carbon atoms do before they get married?

Carbon dating.

2208
Shane Ronay
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What did the man's wife say when he woke up hung over, after a party?

She asked what was "ale"ing him.

706
Akiva Lane
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Why was the king nauseous?

Because the people were revolting.

1672
Akiva Lane
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What do you do when you first feel an itch?

You start from scratch.

2601
Miriam Lane
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Why was it hard to get things done in the Middle Ages?

Because everything was futile (feudal).

2466
Akiva Lane
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What does the Constitution have in common with balancing a checkbook?

Checks and balances.

1158
General
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What does a cell phone, a credit card, and a bullfight have it common?

They all involve charging.

2984
Akiva Lane
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What did the Howard Knot Rope Company say about its competitors?

They're not Knot knots.

3081
Akiva Lane
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When Ellie Smith married Darth Vader why did she feel things were going up?

She became Ellie Vader.

1613
Akiva Lane
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What fictional character had an open mind?

Frankenstein.

2151
Akiva Lane
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What information is in an Art History book?

Artifacts.

2669
Akiva Lane
General
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How did farmer Jones know not to feed his ox eggs?

Because the ox rebelled against any yokes.

1718