Pictures:

Why wasn't Tom happy with the fund his broker suggest he buy?

The feeling wasn't mutual.

383

What is this man doing in the doctor's office?

Drawing blood.

1043

What does a rice farmer in the Czech Republic and a checkbook made of rice paper have in common with this image?

They're all rice chex.

2951

What can be said about people who work around the clock?

They are shiftless.

76

What did the math teacher try to convey to her class?

Everything has its pluses and minuses.

263

Why did the Chinese military leader suffer from malnutrition?

Everyone kept eating General Tso's chicken.

335

What did the young man and woman eskimos have to do on their first date?

Break the ice.

895

When the nerve cell tells the muscle cell to contract, what is the muscle cell's reaction?

You have some nerve!

546

Why did Jenny dislike her job as a stenographer?

Because her boss was a dictator.

60

What do you call a tax on things that people do wrong?

Syntax.

462

How do you describe a doctor that is against nasal sprays?

He's anti anti-histamines.

2430

How did diners at the Chinese restaurant react to the LED lighting?

They asked if they could Dim Sum.

334