Pictures:

Why didn't the clam share its food?

Because it was shell-fish.

1766

What do you call someone who drives and flies a car-plane?

An auto-pilot.

1412

What's the problem with a person being in Valid, Sweden?

He's in Valid.

1637

What items does someone most need to weather an emergency?

Staples

294

Why is this bandwagon no longer in use?

Too many people were jumping on it.

1813

What did Emily do when all the potato chips fell on the floor?

She let the chips fall where they may.

604

Why didn't the mother want her son to listen to the radio too much?

She didn't want him to become too radio-active.

2803

How did Marty respond when his wife accused him of drinking a fifth of whisky?

He pleaded the fifth.

1831

What are flies that hang around a clock called?

Time flies.

893

What does this represent?

Youtube.

763

What do you call a large party where matzah is served?

A matzah ball.

2758

What is someone called who tunes the instruments for an opera house?

An opera tunist.

2440