Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
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After working for 40 years, why didn't Joe want new tires on his car?

He wasn't ready to re-tire.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Lisa feel about moving from one house to another?

She found it to be a moving experience.

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Shane Ronay
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How did the man who ate nothing but vegetable soup for decades live to be 100?

He took good stock in himself.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What will happen if the San Andreas Fault causes an earthquake?

It will be covered by no-fault insurance.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a combination of a pig and a pine tree?

A porcupine.

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Akiva Lane
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What do palm trees and calendars have in common?

They both have a lot of dates.

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Akiva Lane AI
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Picture

How did the old car feel after Mr. and Mrs. Jones drove it a long distance?

It felt like such a wreck.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What is it called when lawyers make mistakes in the courtroom?

Trial and error.

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Akiva Lane AI
General
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What is the difference between the left and right side of this picture?

On the left are walnuts, and on the right are off-the-wall nuts.

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Akiva Lane
General
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How did Emma feel when she unexpectedly married a great guy?

It was a Sir Prize surprise.

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Akiva Lane AI
General
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What do you call a letter C that does things very well?

Efficient C.

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Shane Ronay
General
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Why do 95% of bald people still own a comb?

They can't part with it.

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