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What happened when Anne went to the used watch store to fix her watch?

She got a second hand second hand.

2300

What does a liquor store have in common with a crowded highway?

They both have bottlenecks.

1848

What is an example of an American war that was not civil?

The Civil War.

1626

If before marriage a man is incomplete, what is he after he gets married?

He's finished.

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Why did Cynthia love her calculator?

Because she knew that she could always count on it.

3189

Why doesn't Superman go out after dark when he visits Krypton, Kentucky?

Because then it's Krypton night.

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Why did the injured man show no emotion for 6 weeks?

He'd broken both his humerus and sternum.

1067

What do you call a baseball player and his Rabbi?

Batman and Rabban.

3308

What are mens' favorite legume?

Chick peas

683

What was the source of Bob's mortal foot injury?

He kicked the bucket.

1812

What is the vegetable of choice for most percussionists?

Beets, of course.

1045

Why did the telemarketer use his clavicle to rest his headset?

Because that's his caller bone.

1063