Pictures:

What do you call ticks that live in a parrot's feathers?

Polly ticks.

2788

What is a person called who knows a lot about eggs?

An eggs-pert.

1112

What do people say when they think something you said is not funny?

Very funny.

427

Why did the mother have sore hands?

She had meta-carpools.

1064

Why did Betty put things on the kitchen scale at 1pm for 9 hours?

She wanted to measure them on a scale from 1 to 10.

528

Why is ethics like art?

You have to know where to draw the line.

48

What kind of tea protects you when you buy something?

Warren Tea.

2894

Why did Jerry Teck become a computer programmer?

Because people always said to him 'Hi Teck'.

2474

Why did King Louis XV say, "After me the flood"?

Because he rained for 59 years.

326

What is the condition called where a person is not allergic to cars?

Auto immune condition.

1040

What does a hiker sleep on?

A nap-sack.

324

Why was it that in the ancient world harps could not be trusted?

Because they were all lyres.

1106