Pictures:

What did the bottles of beers in the ice cooler say to each other?

Let's chill.

2473

Why are the Patriot missiles kosher?

Because they have fins and chew their scuds.

821

Why did the loaf of bread feel insecure?

It felt kneady.

2591

Who was more intelligent as a child - Alec Baldwin or Alec Guinness?

They were both Smart Alecs.

1126

How was the rabbit rewarded for keeping mice out of the garden?

With an increase in celery.

1443

What is an expert in making signs called?

A sign-tist.

2423

Why was Emily reluctant to use a tractor on her farm?

Because it didn't attract her.

1373

Why do French eat snails?

They don't like fast food.

3235

What kind of bean has regrets?

A coulda bean.

731

What is an aunt that is a great cook called?

Aunty Pasto.

727

Which famous explorer invented the golf shirt?

Marco Polo

1600

Why do we use the term "rode" once we've ridden?

We've been down that road before.

1094