Pictures:

What do you say about someone who buys cheap candy that causes them to gain weight?

Penny wise and pound foolish.

2262

How do you make a waterbed more bouncy?

Use spring water.

3111

How does a salesman fasten a customer's attention to a sales pitch?

It has to be fasten-ating.

2025

What happened when a jar of pickles spilled onto music sheets?

It made sour notes.

690

Did this school receive its name on purpose?

No, by occident.

487

What did the world think about Edison's invention of the light bulb?

They thought it was a brilliant idea.

2468

What happens before posterous?

It's pre-posterous.

2965

Why do dessert lovers like this airline?

They serve pie in the sky.

1300

What do leaders say when they demand that everyone follow what they say?

The ruler's rules rule.

1906

What does a cell phone and a gold ring have in common?

They both have a ring tone.

3040

What do you call a delicatessen that specializes in lox?

A lox smith.

2226

What did pregnant Emily and the library book she was reading have in common?

They were both due in September.

1628