Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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How did Max feel about pulling his old couch to the junkyard?

It was such a drag.

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Akiva Lane
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What does life have in common with arithmetic?

It has its pluses and minuses.

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Akiva Lane
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When Bob went camping, why did he avoid touching the tents?

He didn't want to feel tents.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Joe, in his new job, feel like the wheels of a car?

He felt tired and under pressure.

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Akiva Lane
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After visiting someone, when they say 'It's been great having you', how can you respond?

It's been great being had.

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Akiva Lane
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Since Jill was on a diet, why was she concerned that the math problems on the test were too easy?

Because they were a piece of cake.

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Yitzchak Berger
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Why was the teacher arrested for using a compass and a ruler?

They are considered weapons of maths destruction.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What should we do about the elephant in the room?

We should be mindful that it's not irrelephant.

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Akiva Lane
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When Martha was quiet when she found out she was pregnant, what was that called?

A pregnant silence.

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Akiva Lane
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What should you do if a piece of folded clothing runs away?

Catch it and bring it back into the fold.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jim want to be a farmer?

He thought he would dig it.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why did Alan enjoy reading the novel about a back doctor?

He liked spine novels.

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