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Akiva Lane
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Why did Marty not want to get rid of his old beat-up car?

Because then he would be wreck-less.

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Akiva Lane
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When Mark heard his friend say 'I saw her in this dress', why did he get alarmed?

He thought he said, 'I saw her in distress'.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Sandy sure that her daughter would become an actress?

Because every time she didn't get her way, she would make a scene.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a farmer who makes medicine from the food he grows?

A farmacist.

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Akiva Lane
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What did it mean when the professional football players argued with the prisoners in a football game?

The argument had its pros and cons.

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Akiva Lane
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After visiting someone, when they say 'It's been great having you', how can you respond?

It's been great being had.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the magazine publisher go to a therapist?

He had a lot of issues.

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Shane Ronay
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Which industry holds most people's interest?

Banking

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Akiva Lane
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What do they say about a great baseball player?

That the hits just keep on coming!

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Akiva Lane
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What fruit can't get married quickly?

Cantaloupe.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the difference between an elephant and a car?

One has the trunk in the front, and the other has the trunk in the back.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the boxer become a good comedian?

He knew how to deliver a good punch-line.

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