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Akiva Lane
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What did Alan say to the gas station after he filled his car gas tank?

Tank you.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Jimmy call the money he made from selling thumb tacks?

Income tacks.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the athlete's manager have him take trains instead of planes?

He felt he could use all the training he could get.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is a popsicle made of mist so interesting?

It's mistacle.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the runner not tie his sneakers?

Because he wanted to win, and not be tied.

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Akiva Lane
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What is this called?

The last straw.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a child called that walks and talks?

A walkie talkie.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the mouse respond when the cat invited him to play?

What's the catch?

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Akiva Lane
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Why did George make a large model of a dime?

Because he wanted to learn how to fall asleep on a dime.

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What vegetable has the best rhythm?

Beets.

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Why is it important that ducks learn to fly at an early age?

Because before they learn to fly they are just sitting ducks.

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During an uprising, what are random groups of armed men called?

Malicious militias.

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