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What do palm trees and calendars have in common?

They both have a lot of dates.

2322

Why was Emily reluctant to use a tractor on her farm?

Because it didn't attract her.

1373

What starts with P and ends with E and has thousands of letters.

Post Office.

956

How would you refer to your dog-sitting neighbor that lost your pet?

Your dog gone neighbor.

1557

Why did the gardener see a dermotologist?

Because of his green thumb.

217

Do professional golfers practice for all 19 holes?

Of course.

1454

What vegetable did Marty not take onto his sailboat?

Leeks.

2976

What can have both a good and bad result?

Pennies from Heaven

209

What does Sudafed mean?

Bringing litigation against a government official.

716

Why did the shark spit out the clown?

It thought he tasted funny.

1251

Which internal organ has the most audacity?

The gall bladder.

1072

What do you call two siblings that are sleeping next to each other?

Nap Kins

2551