Pictures:

Why did the head of the school demand respect?

It was the principle of the thing.

2124

What do you call a place where crows drink beer?

A crow bar.

111

When did the mother of a newborn boy wake up?

At son rise.

1489

Why did Jay attend traffic court for his illegal Left Turn?

He knew he was right.

1090

What happens to an illegally parked frog?

Toad.

461

What did pregnant Emily and the library book she was reading have in common?

They were both due in September.

1628

Where do livestock veterinarians have their prescriptions filled?

At the farmacy

1185

What's the most prevalent sickness among roofers?

Shingles

192

What is a good 2-part security method?

Beagles and locks.

2549

What did Max do when he joined the surfboard team?

He was onboarded.

2235

Why did Beth wear sneakers when she did the wash?

In case the colors would run.

1803

What is similar between the Amazon jungle and tennis?

The Amazon used to have cannibals and tennis has a can of balls.

1873