Pictures:

Why did Alan shoot an arrow into the wind?

He liked shooting the breeze.

2908

Why didn't the shark eat the Princess?

Because she was spoiled.

1321

Why did the guy from a poor neighborhood study to be a car mechanic?

He wanted to go from under the hood to under the hood.

3195

What is someone called who is so good at finding things, that people pay for searching?

Profound.

2306

What does lettuce say when it rains?

Lettuce grow.

3172

What is a fancy expensive scale called?

Upscale.

1771

What's good about using lion bookends?

Then you can read between the lions.

980

When it rains, how are trees and grass similar to people?

They enjoy taking a shower.

3166

Do people enjoy recycling so many items?

Sort of.

1633

What do you call a tax on things that people do wrong?

Syntax.

462

What do you call an appointment that gets cancelled?

A dis-appointment.

3029

What happens to dairy cows when they die?

They get CREAMated.

1059