Pictures:

Why did the luxury home builder use only inexpensive laminate kitchen countertops?

He lost his marbles

216

Why did Beth wear a blindfold when she slept?

Because her husband was such a light sleeper.

655

What are abortions called in Czechoslovakia?

Cancelled Czechs

2116

What is the difference between being united and being untied.

Getting 'it' backwards.

85

How did they describe the situation where the band's bass players were drunk?

The basses were loaded.

446

Why did the husband and wife put their hands in the sink together when they wanted to communicate?

It helped them be in-sink with each other.

808

What do you call someone who is an expert about alarm clocks?

An alarmist.

1588

What is a father called who is an expert at doing things?

A doo dad.

1385

Why did the leopard go the empty parking lot and go from one parking space to another?

It wanted to prove wrong those said it couldn't change its spots.

2301

What did the world think about Edison's invention of the light bulb?

They thought it was a brilliant idea.

2468

Which Einstein idea concerns family relations?

The Theory of Relativity.

1541

How does a person's body change when he's curious?

He becomes all ears.

2010