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What is a happy insect called?

An uptick.

3135

What kind of doctor is specifically assigned to you?

Your-ologist.

2451

What was a misunderstanding between Bill and his wife?

She asked for toilet water for her birthday, and he didn't know it meant perfume.

660

Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

Because it's pointless.

971

What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A black board.

2032

What happens when you put on a thick sweater and get very hot?

You become the sweater.

1918

Why can't everyone text at the same speed?

Not everyone is the same type.

1092

What happened when the truck carrying jelly had an accident?

Traffic jam.

1364

How did the Smith family feel when they spent a lot of money painting their house blue, and they didn't like the color?

They felt they blew it, and they had the blues.

1608

What is the richest perfume.

Musk.

2496

What permission is needed to kill lice?

A lice sense.

2819

What does a watch repairman have in common with turning a wheel left to right?

They are both clock wise.

1916