Pictures:

When the nerve cell tells the muscle cell to contract, what is the muscle cell's reaction?

You have some nerve!

546

C to shining C

2294

How did the the drunkard summarize his drinking binge?

With a short schnapsis

181

Why did the weasel go to prison?

The mink stole.

1042

What do cows use for money?

Moolah

2963

Why did Janet join the church choir?

She likes singing hims.

1481

What does a policeman, a fireman, and a doorman all have in common?

They're all men.

1531

Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages?

Because there were so many knights.

646

What did Alice call the hair she cut off because it was full of knots?

Forget me knots.

2453

Why is sitting sometimes difficult?

You have to sit down and sit up at the same time.

1119

How do people sometimes feel when they are given the cold sholder?

Ice-olated.

2304

What happens if a cat falls into vinegar?

It becomes a sourpuss.

1725