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Why was the keyboard unhappy?

Because its keys were always depressed.

2099

What happened when farmer Brown taught his seeds to be concerned about the poor.

The pro seeds went to charity.

452

What is meat that falls on the floor called?

Ground meat.

913

What day is just before a birthday?

Labor day.

2441

How did the podiatrist react to having no patients all week?

De-feeted

498

What is it called when husbands tell puns to their wives?

Pun-ishment.

93

How did David feel about praying in a talis?

It was a fringe benefit.

531

Why did the luxury home builder use only inexpensive laminate kitchen countertops?

He lost his marbles

216

After the earthquake destroyed the land where a well was, what did the engineer say who was looking for it in the dark?

I don't feel well.

3298

What does Sudafed mean?

Bringing litigation against a government official.

716

How would you describe ordinary airplanes in a large empty area?

Plain planes on a plain plain.

2432

How does one get men to listen?

Stress to "He'd" his words.

1483