Pictures:

What was the message on the chiropractor's answering machine?

We'll get BACK to you.

241

Do you want an ark for protection from a flood?

I Noah guy who can help.

984

How did the English teacher teach the class spelling?

She cast them under her spell.

829

Why was the keyboard unhappy?

Because its keys were always depressed.

2099

Why did the lawyer have a fish tank in his office?

It made everything more o-fish-al.

2948

What kind of bean has regrets?

A coulda bean.

731

What did Barry say when he saw his neighbor put a muzzle on his dangerous dog?

Muzzle Tov!

1835

Why did the owner of the factory close the factory when the workers went on strike a third time?

He said 3 strikes and we're out.

3290

What is a partnership of 2 doctors called?

A pair-a-dox.

652

What electronic device is named after an American insect?

USB

608

Why did Arnold start a company that makes shovels?

He wanted to do well in spades.

1033

What do you call a Jewish congregation in Orange County that tries to focus on their prayers?

Concentrated Orange Jews.

346