Pictures:

How did Martha feel about going back to work on Monday?

It was a weak day.

561

Why didn't Mike want to go to the supermarket?

He was afraid of the 'eggs aisle'.

2148

Which dog breed is the most inherently spoiled?

Rot weilers

1518

How do you get someone to say 'Who's there?'

You say 'Knock, knock'

2974

What location do these symbols refer to?

Times Square.

674

What is it called when fishermen connect their nets together to catch fish?

An internet.

2435

Why did Betty put things on the kitchen scale at 1pm for 9 hours?

She wanted to measure them on a scale from 1 to 10.

528

What fruit can't get married quickly?

Cantaloupe.

718

What part of an animal allows it to conceal itself?

It's hide.

126

What continent is named after ants?

Antartica.

2564

What do employees of a pen company get when they retire?

A pen sion.

2882

Why was the uncle's wife nervous?

She was feeling 'auntsy'.

2119