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When Ellie Smith married Darth Vader why did she feel things were going up?

She became Ellie Vader.

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What did the choir call their concert in May?

A May Sing.

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What food is this?

Apple Pie

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Why didn't the two gangs have their scheduled showdown?

Because one gang didn't show up.

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What did the artist do before he made a sculpture of a person's head?

He had to plan a head.

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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

Because it was two tired.

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How did Jim feel when he thought he was losing his marbles?

He felt marble-less.

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Did you hear about the lawsuit between NBA players and the league?

It was a basket case.

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What do you call someone who lends money at very high interest rates?

A loan wolf.

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What music makes a person feel like a worn out cloth?

Rag time.

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What nickname did Billy's English teacher give him because his essays were so good?

Bill of writes.

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Why did the factory that made car transmissions have problems?

Because their assembly line was make-shift.

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