Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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Why did Bill try not to reminisce about his days in the Merchant Marines?

He didn't want to miss the boat.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the mathematician plant an apple tree?

He knew how to multiply, so in addition he wanted to be fruitful.

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What happened when Billy's mom shouted 'Wake up!', and he just caught the school bus?

It was a close call.

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What do you call a story about wet Yankee uniforms?

Damp Yankees.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the smoker, who craved a cigarette, feel when he got to smoke one?

Nicotine in the nick of time.

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Akiva Lane
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What does praying and Swiss cheese have in common?

They are both holy.

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Akiva Lane
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When there is a team of horses, what advantage do the horses in back have?

They have hindsight.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Billy ask his father to take a baseball bat and a bird to the baseball game?

Because he liked bat man and robin.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the letter O called when it acts strange?

A weirdo.

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Why is the Garden of Eden called 'Gan Eden' in Hebrew?

Because before they knew it, it was 'gone'.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Evelyn dislike being near chickens?

Because they used fowl language.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jack felt that his out-house was too dark, how did he feel after he put a large hole on the top of the door to let in light?

I needed that like a hole in the head.

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