Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is a doctor called who takes care of stomach gas?

A fizz-ician.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why did Arnold always bet at the same race track?

He had a one-track mind.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Where do small burps live?

In the sub-burps.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What did the sculptor do before he sculpted the subject's head?

He had to plan a head.

2069
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

How did John feel when his alarm clock woke him up?

He found it alarming.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why should you take a sharp pencil seriously?

It has a good point.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why did Bill's moving company shake the furniture as they moved it?

Because they wanted to be movers and shakers.

1986
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Where are ings located?

In Ing-land.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Sam get up from bed in the morning?

He decided he wasn't going to take it lying down anymore.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

How do you describe a mediocre seamstress?

A so-so sew-sew.

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Shane Ronay
General
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Why was the nurse pleased to immunize this boy?

Because she was giving him her best shot.

1800
Akiva Lane
General
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What vegetables were on strike?

The onions, because they were onion-ized.

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