Pictures:

What did the man say after a meteor destroyed his house?

This really hit home.

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How did Max feel about his rash?

He found it very irritating.

1211

What do you have when you remove the red lines?

love

2918

Why did Arnold always bet at the same race track?

He had a one-track mind.

1348

What did it prove when the teacher forced the class to write a long essay?

That might makes write.

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What do you call someone who measures how much status people have?

A statustician

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What did Barry say when he saw his neighbor put a muzzle on his dangerous dog?

Muzzle Tov!

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During the truce in a war, what soup did both sides eat?

Peas soup.

1345

Why did the writer visit the U.S. Mint?

To coin a phrase.

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Who was more intelligent as a child - Alec Baldwin or Alec Guinness?

They were both Smart Alecs.

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Why didn't Mike want to go to the supermarket?

He was afraid of the 'eggs aisle'.

2148

What do we wear on our wrist that is similar to the people who guard a rock band?

The watchband.

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