Pictures:

Why did the laptop catch a cold?

Because Windows was left open.

2348

Why didn't the group of doctors sit down?

They didn't want to be sitting docs.

2138

How do you say hello to the middle of the day?

High, noon!

345

What happens if a cat falls into vinegar?

It becomes a sourpuss.

1725

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

Congress.

298

Why are fast runners good looking?

Because they are dashing.

1614

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten-tickles.

1168

Jason Hernandez is 7'3", and wears the largest shoes in the world..

That's quite a feet.

1477

A tripod.

2708

What does a duck wear to his wedding?

A ducksedo.

2515

Why don't people realize when the owner of a flower shop makes fun of them?

They can't see the florist for the tease.

193

Why is the plural of garbage garbage?

No matter how much garbage there is, it's still garbage.

622