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What kind of log can't change directions?

An ideologue.

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At what kind of table does one read the New York Times?

The Times table.

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If you can get 100 somethings for a penny today, how sure can you be that this will be the price tomorrow?

One hundred per cent.

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Why did Jim's friends buy him a 10-foot pole?

Now he has a 10-foot pole to not touch objectionable things with.

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How do you describe the taste of a spicy pun?

Pungent

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Did Billy wake up very early to join his friends in the camping trip?

Yes, he rose to the occasion.

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What part of a river is in the present?

Its currents.

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Why did Nancy like turning on light bulbs?

She enjoyed the experience of 'seeing the light'.

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If a leader doesn't have a clear inspiring vision, what is the result?

Di-vision.

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How do baseball players keep in touch with each other?

They touch base with each other.

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What do we wear on our wrist that is similar to the people who guard a rock band?

The watchband.

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The order of what 2 syllables makes the difference between happy and sad?

Being upbeat is better than being beat up.

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