What is a doctor called who takes care of stomach gas?

A fizz-ician.

885

What race has more people in it than any other?

The human race.

839

What happened to the person who snuck into the heated swimming pool?

He's now in hot water.

672

What do you call a father from Iceland?

An ice pop.

1736

What spice doesn't need an expiration date?

Thyme.

1117

What can a person do terribly that is really good?

To miss someone terribly.

555

What are earings called that are in the shape of pears?

A pear of earrings.

1018

How do you fix a broken pumpkin?

With a pumpkin patch.

2107

Why did Sam wear waterproof shoes to work?

It was a new job, and he was getting his feet wet.

599

How did Mr. and Mrs. Jones feel about their tax bill?

They felt under attacks.

454

How did people feel when the Eastern and Western railroads met?

They were glad to make ends meet.

1327

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

543