Akiva Lane
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What is a doctor called who takes care of stomach gas?

A fizz-ician.

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Akiva Lane
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What race has more people in it than any other?

The human race.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened to the person who snuck into the heated swimming pool?

He's now in hot water.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a father from Iceland?

An ice pop.

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Akiva Lane
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What spice doesn't need an expiration date?

Thyme.

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Akiva Lane
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What can a person do terribly that is really good?

To miss someone terribly.

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Akiva Lane
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What are earings called that are in the shape of pears?

A pear of earrings.

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Matt Weiss
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How do you fix a broken pumpkin?

With a pumpkin patch.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Sam wear waterproof shoes to work?

It was a new job, and he was getting his feet wet.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Mr. and Mrs. Jones feel about their tax bill?

They felt under attacks.

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Akiva Lane
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How did people feel when the Eastern and Western railroads met?

They were glad to make ends meet.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

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