What happened when Bob re-labled the jars in his wife's spice rack?

He's not in trouble yet, but the thyme is cumin.

1956

What do you call a paper airplane that can't fly?

Stationary.

1925

What does Sudafed mean?

Bringing litigation against a government official.

716

How does a hippie with 2 wives count them?

One Mrs. Hippie, two Mrs. Hippie.

1648

Why didn't Jane play hide and seek?

Good players are hard to find.

1910

Why was Fred very good at sleeping?

He could do it with his eyes closed.

1332

What word is spelled incorrectly in the dictionary?

The word 'incorrectly'.

1896

How did Bill feel after he spent time crushing soda cans?

It was soda pressing.

613

What does the word 'avoidable' mean?

It's what a bull fighter tries to do.

715

Why did Betty distrust stairs?

She felt they were always up to something.

1333

What do you call someone who puts together kitchen cabinets?

A counter fitter.

2485

Why was the teacher arrested for using a compass and a ruler?

They are considered weapons of maths destruction.

671