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Akiva Lane
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Bill saved his pennies all year to buy a present for his wife, and brought them to a store, and do you know what he got?

A hernia.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the can opener get its name?

Because it 'can' open things.

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How do we know that the Almighty is a baseball fan?

His first book starts, 'In the big inning'.

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Akiva Lane
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When do you stop looking for something?

When you find it.

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What can you say about a bagel with a very large hole?

It's hole is bigger than the sum of its parts.

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What is more minute than a minute?

A second.

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What are US Treasury Bonds called that move around a lot?

Vaga-Bonds.

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What is the plan called where you make sure that you do something productive every single hour of the day?

Hour power.

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about an old couch that was fixed?

It was in bad shape, but now it's recovered.

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What did the other angles say to the 90 degree angle?

You're right.

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Why did Billy ask his father to take a baseball bat and a bird to the baseball game?

Because he liked bat man and robin.

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What was Maxine's reaction when the website asked her to refresh her internet browser?

She found that it was a refreshing experience.

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