Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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Why did Linda name her dogs Rolex and Timex?

They were her watch dogs.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the problem with @, #, %, &, and *?

They think that they are special characters.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a good ad slogan for the Grates metal company?

Get great grates at Grates grates.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the table cloth say to the table?

Don't be concerned, I've got you covered.

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Akiva Lane
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What song verses appeal to everyone, and where do they teach this?

Uni-verse, taught in a Uni-verse-ity

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Akiva Lane
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How did the decorations on the toilet paper feel?

They were on a roll.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the writer feel when his books were no longer cited?

He felt ex-cited.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a scientist whose funding got taken away?

A mad scientist.

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Akiva Lane
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What was the zoo like when all the bears were sent to a different zoo?

It was unbearable.

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Akiva Lane
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What finger does a card-shark use to manipulate the card deck?

The in-decks finger.

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Akiva Lane
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Will wind turbines be successful in producing clean energy?

The answer is blowing in the wind.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Mark regard his habit of drinking beer every day?

He regarded it as minor ale-ment.

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