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What key does the King use to get into the castle?

The Monarch Key.

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What happens if a cat falls into vinegar?

It becomes a sourpuss.

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What are commas, periods, and question marks that are used in puns called?

Pun-cuation.

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If a leader doesn't have a clear inspiring vision, what is the result?

Di-vision.

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If you put blue berries deep in the ground, what are they called?

Very buried berries.

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What does the Constitution have in common with balancing a checkbook?

Checks and balances.

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Why the quarterback run with the ball?

When he didn't see any receivers, his original plan didn't come to pass.

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Why did Avigail get mad when her 10 year old daughter put on lipstick?

Because it made her see red.

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When you put chili sauce in the refrigerator in Santiago, what does it become?

Chile chilly chili sauce.

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Why did Sam get up from bed in the morning?

He decided he wasn't going to take it lying down anymore.

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What did the vegetarian say to the salami?

You are THE wurst.

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Why was Bill's band - that hummed while playing drums - not successful?

It was humdrum.

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