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How did the vegetarians react when Melinda offered to bring sweet and sour chicken to the party?

They said, keep your two scents out of it.

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How did Betty feel when her guests said they wanted coffee instead of her delicious Thyme tea?

She didn't want to waste her Thyme on them.

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Why did Dan double the size of the pockets on his pants?

He was told that to afford everything, he needed deep pockets.

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If before marriage a man is incomplete, what is he after he gets married?

He's finished.

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What is the most disrespectable aspect of the computer?

The cursor.

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What are the 2 most agreeable letters?

OK

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What information is in an Art History book?

Artifacts.

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What happens when a person has to work on Sundays?

It's a weakened weekend.

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How is this feeling?

Wheely well.

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Why was the air traffic contoller fired?

Because he didn't know what was flying.

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What can you say about the person who founded Kelloggs?

He was a cereal entrepreneur.

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How do we know that the Almighty is a baseball fan?

His first book starts, 'In the big inning'.

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