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Akiva Lane
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How did Mark feel when he used a machine to get rid of his static?

He felt ex-static.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Marsha like to read on the steps of the NY Public Library?

She believed that for meaning, you have to read between the lions.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the people realize that calling their town Competent was not a good idea?

Then all the people in the town would be in Competent.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you say hello to the middle of the day?

High, noon!

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Bill make a rocket made of wood-work?

Because he thought it would work.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Bob always looking down at his wife's high heel shoes?

Because he was head over heels over her.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the tight-rope walker wear warm shoes?

He was concerned about getting cold feet.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bill lose so much weight?

Whenever he was about to eat - he thought of the word 'weight', and it reminded him to wait.

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Akiva Lane
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When Anne's mother suggested that she learn how to play bridge, what was Anne's response?

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Max react when his wife served fish for supper 6 days in a row?

He said, "There's something fishy about this".

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Billy find it so easy to climb walls?

Because he was so off the wall.

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Akiva Lane
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What is an arrangement with UPS, Fedex, or DHL to send a package called?

A package deal.

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