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Akiva Lane
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Were the people in the Middle Ages bad people?
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Not really, they were only medi-evil.
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1202
Akiva Lane
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What French Queen did not advocate dieting?
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Marie Antoinette said 'Let them eat cake.'
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2200
Akiva Lane
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What do you do when you first feel an itch?
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You start from scratch.
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2601
Akiva Lane
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What did Bill's therapist say about his putting plus signs in front of all numbers?
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He said it was a good sign and a positive development.
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109
Akiva Lane
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Why did the light switch feel ambivalent about the people in the house?
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Sometimes it felt turned off.
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1936
Akiva Lane
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How did the moose get into the restaurant?
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The customer asked for mousse, and the waiter brought him one.
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2016
Akiva Lane
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Why did Bob put some salt on everything he ate?
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He was told to take everything with a grain of salt.
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523
Akiva Lane
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How can psychiatrists charge so much?
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Because people have to be crazy to pay those rates.
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2620
Akiva Lane
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What happens if a cat falls into vinegar?
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It becomes a sourpuss.
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1725
Akiva Lane
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How did Joe the boxer feel after being slugged in the face?
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He felt very sluggish.
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2155
Akiva Lane
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How did Marty know what types of kitchen counters his customers really wanted?
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It was always counter-intuitive.
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2942
Akiva Lane
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What is a problem with the summer?
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The weather is heading for a fall.
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1668
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