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How are vegetables different than kids?

Vegetables are bad when spoiled and good when fresh, but it's not good if kids are either fresh or spoiled.

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Why did Billy ask to borrow his friend's shoes?

Because he was told not to judge someone until you stand in their shoes.

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What do you call a rat whose name is Demmik?

Demmik Rat.

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Why is the last part of a meal called dessert?

That's when people desert their diet.

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What do carbon atoms do before they get married?

Carbon dating.

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Since Jill was on a diet, why was she concerned that the math problems on the test were too easy?

Because they were a piece of cake.

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What do you call someone who lends money at very high interest rates?

A loan wolf.

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What song does this represent?

Oh say can you see.

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If something is furbished twice, what does it become?

Refurbished.

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What's another way of saying that it seems that I have 4 pears?

It appears that I have a pair of a pair of pears.

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Why did Martha carry a small rock with her?

To remind her that sometimes life is hard.

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Why did Bill take music stands from other places, and put them in his house?

When he felt strongly about something, he felt he needed to take a stand.

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