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What do palm trees and calendars have in common?

They both have a lot of dates.

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Why did Martha practice drawing lions?

Her therapist said that there were times she had to get better at drawing the lion.

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What is the version of Arabian Nights that takes place in Rome?

Al-Latin.

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What is a policeman called when he's sleeping in bed?

An undercover cop.

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How did people react when Joe pulled down a 'No Demonstrations' sign without getting caught by the police?

"How did you pull that off?"

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What is similar between a tile salesman and a lizard?

One is a tile rep, and the other is a reptile.

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What 3 letters do you have to be very cautious and wary of?

NME

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What is a course called where you learn to be a doctor with material you get in the mail?

A post doctorate.

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What do you call software whose sales are flat?

Flatware

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What do you call an ocean that fools the boats that are on it?

Hypocra Sea.

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What are some things a person can do if they are stuck thinking about the past?

The can buy 'presents' for other people, or go to a river and look at the 'current'.

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What is it called when a leak is fixed in the ceiling?

Sealing the ceiling.

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