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Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who doesn't care about what people say about him?

He has heard immunity.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the name of the rock band that sings about failure?

Rock Bottom

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the politician take a part-time job as a cashier?

He wanted to learn more about change.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the mouse respond when the cat invited him to play?

What's the catch?

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about the stories of how staples, paper-clips, and thumb-tacks were developed?

They are all fasten-ating.

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Akiva Lane
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Why do female sheep often have an identity crisis?

Because they think, "I am a ewe".

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Akiva Lane
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What is something that causes anger called?

A precursor.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a good name for a car repair shop, that takes care of cars like a mother cares for children?

Good Car Ma

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Akiva Lane
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When the patient said he had trouble with his memory, how did the doctor respond?

In that case, you pay me up front.

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Akiva Lane
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When Mark heard his friend say 'I saw her in this dress', why did he get alarmed?

He thought he said, 'I saw her in distress'.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jim went to the seashore at dawn, how did he feel when the early morning mist cleared?

He had liked being in the midst of the mist, and he missed the mist.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of bee can't make up its mind?

A maybe

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