Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Olivia avoid eating almonds, cashews, and pecans?

Because they were nuts.

1962
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

How did Helvetica respond when someone suggested that she go out with Times New Roman?

He's not my type.

1529
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did the bed feel bad?

When people slept on it, it felt under a rest.

3027
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Beverly learn about all kinds of varieties of nuts?

She wanted to be good at identifying people who are nuts.

2990
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why didn't the inventor try to make a car engine totally out of wooden parts?

Because he knew it wooden work.

2801
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What can you say about 2 matches?

They match.

2595
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Sam put his shoes close to the fireplace?

When people say 'hot shoes', he says 'G-d bless you'.

761
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Billy find it so easy to climb walls?

Because he was so off the wall.

1388
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why didn't Mike want to go to the supermarket?

He was afraid of the 'eggs aisle'.

2148
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

On what floor of a building do workers grind wheat into flour?

The ground floor.

1383
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What would be the result if you used incense made from mushrooms?

A mushroom cloud.

2465
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call a delicatessen in a mental hospital?

A psycho deli.

1917