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Why did Emma avoid using coins?

She thought they were all two-faced.

364

What is it called when the earth shakes around a duck farm?

An earth quack.

439

What is something before it was redundant?

Dundant.

1974

What happened to the lawyer who spent too much time drinking at the bar?

He was dis-barred.

1627

What does the word 'injest' mean?

To eat something while laughing.

41

What day of the week do people get married on?

Wedding's day.

479

What do doctors and musicians have in common?

They both use instruments.

2426

What is it called when sugar cane rebels against the farmer?

The cane mutiny.

539

How did Helvetica respond when someone suggested that she go out with Times New Roman?

He's not my type.

1529

Why did the bear not want to wear shoes?

It couldn't bear not having bare feet.

2692

What do you call a young female cow?

Miss Steak.

54

How did the writer feel when his books were no longer cited?

He felt ex-cited.

2079