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Akiva Lane
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What did the husband say when he brought his wife flowers?

This bud's for you.

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Akiva Lane
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What are earings called that are in the shape of pears?

A pear of earrings.

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Akiva Lane
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What would happen if Earth was attacked by giant spiders from outer space?

A world wide web.

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What was Karl Marx and his brother called?

The Marx brothers.

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Why did Bill's moving company shake the furniture as they moved it?

Because they wanted to be movers and shakers.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Max feel about pulling his old couch to the junkyard?

It was such a drag.

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What kind of exercize is not worth doing?

An exercize in futility.

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Why do internet browsers tend to gain weight?

They use cookies.

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Akiva Lane
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Why should you be careful with things that seem great?

Because great begins with the word grey.

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Akiva Lane
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When the pioneers cut down trees to clear the land, how did they feel about the difficult process of uprooting the tree stumps?

They felt stumped.

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Why did the programmer call an exterminator?

Because he had a bug in his program.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the student study outside in the cold?

Because he wanted to learn the subject cold.

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