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Akiva Lane
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When Mark got sick and couldn't play trumpet in the school band for a week, what did he do?

The doctor gave him a note that he couldn't play notes.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Sam and Betty describe that they walked on a different path in the woods every day?

Roam wasn't built in a day.

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Akiva Lane
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What vegetable jumps into the deep end of the pool?

The endive.

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Akiva Lane
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What do teachers and eyes have in common?

They both have pupils.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill like going to malls?

He felt that if you see one, you see the mall.

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Akiva Lane
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What are 5 tow trucks?

A foot truck.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is a mind like a parachute?

It only works when it is open.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a good name for a store that sells sofas?

Sofa so good.

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Akiva Lane
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How is party different than a toy?

When a party winds up it ends, and when a toy winds up it starts.

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What continent is named after ants?

Antartica.

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What excuse can be used by a person who drinks too much?

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bill feel when none of the off-switches for the lights worked?

He felt that they were all up-settings.

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