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How do you wake up bread?

You make it rise.

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What can you say about someone who thinks he will make a lot of money playing dice?

He's in a fool's para-dice.

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What do you call a Polish person who is fishing?

A fishing Pole.

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Why is the last part of a meal called dessert?

That's when people desert their diet.

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What is the heaviest Chinese soup?

One Ton soup.

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What is the motto of someone who eats just a little too much?

Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we diet.

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Why was the singer on a strict diet?

She had to be concerned with both musical scales and other scales.

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How did Bob react when his friend said, 'You look so sunburned, did you use enough sun tan oil'.

Bob responded, 'You don't have to rub in in.'

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What did the jigsaw puzzle man have trouble with?

He found it hard to pull himself together.

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Why was Sandy sure that her daughter would become an actress?

Because every time she didn't get her way, she would make a scene.

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What are light bulbs that are very heavy called?

Heavy bulbs.

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What Beatles song is about a bee in a vegetable garden?

Lettuce bee.

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