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Akiva Lane
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How did Sandra feel about half the numbers when she was learning arithmetic?

She thought they were odd.

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What can you take when you're tired?

You can take a walk, a break, a nap, a rest, a vacation, or a deep breath.

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When John proposed to Joan, what playing card did he look like to Joan?

The King of Hearts.

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What is similar about doctors' situations before and after they graduate from medical school?

First they need patience, and then they need patients.

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What do you call a family that has generations of restaurants?

A dine-asty.

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What can be said about Betty who didn't clean the kitchen often enough?

She led a life of grime.

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What did the rancher say to the person he thought was taking down parts of his fence?

I'm accusing you, but I hope you don't take offence.

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What do you say when you look at the ocean after a long time away?

Long time no sea.

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How did Sam's parents react when he threw the cereal in the garbage without eating it.

They said he was a cereal killer.

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When do you tell people what they are?

When you tell them, 'You are welcome'.

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Why was Ed surprised he had a moustache?

He didn't shave there for a while, and it happened under his nose.

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What school teaches about tea?

Universi-Tea.

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