Pictures:

Why did Amy like giving watches as presents?

She felt there is no present like the time.

1643

What do you call a story about a mouse that lives in 2 cities?

A Tail Of Two Cities.

3085

What is someone called who tunes the instruments for an opera house?

An opera tunist.

2440

What did Alan say about his daughter traveling so much after she won the state's beauty contest?

I miss miss Missouri.

1965

What do you call a veterinarian that used to be in the army?

A vet vet.

1586

Where do small burps live?

In the sub-burps.

1505

How was Bill's mug shot that was taken when he was arrested by mistake?

The picture didn't do him justice.

2065

What's another name for a metronome.

A beat-nik.

787

What was Betty's reaction when the glass jar fell and broke?

She found it jarring.

2140

What happened to Bill?

He tripped while he was on a trip.

558

What has one eye, no mouth, and everyone agrees that it always makes a good point.

A needle.

1591

What is the result of a person being cold to others?

He becomes ice-olated.

103