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Akiva Lane
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Why did Sam put his shoes close to the fireplace?

When people say 'hot shoes', he says 'G-d bless you'.

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Akiva Lane
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When Andrea lost her ring, what did her husband suggest?

Try calling it, and see if it rings.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call noodles that are very fresh?

New-dles

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What do people wear when going out to battle?

A war drobe.

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Why did the husband and wife feel very close to each other?

Because she was only one 'meet her' away.

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When Sir Edmund Hillary climbed Mount Everest in 1953, how did he feel?

He felt on top of the world.

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What finger does a card-shark use to manipulate the card deck?

The in-decks finger.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the vegetarian say to the salami?

You are THE wurst.

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Akiva Lane
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Why are the internal parts of the body called organs?

Because they are all so well organized.

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Why did Alan make sure his deck wasn't empty when he played with his kids?

He wanted to make sure he was playing with a full deck.

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What do you call a very elaborate rap song?

A rap-sody.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the rabbit jumping for joy?

Because it was very hoppy.

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