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Akiva Lane
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Why did Betty stop eating sausage?

She thought it was the wurst.

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What is the difference between a park and a mental institution?

The park has cycle paths.

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What is similar between a baseball player and a guard at a large party?

They both try to keep their eye on the ball.

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Why did Lisa buy things with pennies?

When she bought things, she wanted to use common cents.

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When Marsha told her husband on the phone that she was late, why did he call the police?

She said she was being held up.

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What is it called when someone gets tired because they are overweight?

Fatigue

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Why didn't Bill like going to the aquarium?

He thought there was something fishy about the place.

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What is a survey about telephone usage called?

A telephone poll.

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When the truck spilled coffee grounds all over Marvin's lawn, what did his lawyer say?

"I think we have grounds for suing the truck company."

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When Stephanie inventeted a way of saying that someone is at the door without ringing a bell, what prize did she win?

The No-Bell prize.

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What can you say about someone who travels with light beams stored in jars?

He packs light.

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On what kind of day does time seem to go slowest?

On a fast day.

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