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Akiva Lane
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What aunt disagrees about everything?

Aunt Tithesis

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Why didn't Billy mind being punished by staying alone in the class after school?

He felt like he was in a class all by himself.

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Why did Jill get so emotional when she moved form one apartment to another?

It was a very moving experience.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of point is not sharp?

A moot point.

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Akiva Lane
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How are vegetables different than kids?

Vegetables are bad when spoiled and good when fresh, but it's not good if kids are either fresh or spoiled.

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Why did Lucy buy poppies from the florist?

It was Father's Day, and she bought flowers for her pop.

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What is a newspaper that puts you asleep called?

The snooze news.

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Akiva Lane
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What part of a computer screen doesn't speak so nicely?

The cursor.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you talk to a pigeon?

Using pidgin English.

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What do you call a woodworker who can make a chair out of a flat piece of wood?

Chair man of the board.

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Akiva Lane
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If something is furbished twice, what does it become?

Refurbished.

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What is a doctor called that treats conditions caused by ticks?

A tick doc.

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