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What is similar about doctors' situations before and after they graduate from medical school?

First they need patience, and then they need patients.

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Akiva Lane
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What symbol is written before it is pronounced?

The dollar sign.

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What are earings called that are in the shape of pears?

A pear of earrings.

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What is the difference between an elephant and a car?

One has the trunk in the front, and the other has the trunk in the back.

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What is a bag called before it wakes up?

A sleeping bag.

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Why did Jerry avoid taking hot baths?

He tried to avoid things that would get him into hot water.

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How did the inventor of the Jack-In-The-Box come up with invention?

He used out-of-the-box thinking.

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What do you call someone who measures how much status people have?

A statustician

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What happens when you take clothes out of a dresser and put them on?

You become the dresser.

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What is a survey about telephone usage called?

A telephone poll.

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What do you call a fish that can't sing?

An out-of-tune a fish.

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What was done wrong here?

Someone put all their eggs in one basket.

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