Akiva Lane
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How is time like an insect?

It tends to creep up on you.

1951
Akiva Lane
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What relative did Bill Royd name the phone operating system after?

Aunt Royd.

1717
Akiva Lane
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What is a drug store called that specializes in drugs from vegetables and fish?

Farm and Sea Pharmacy.

2184
Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who is an expert about alarm clocks?

An alarmist.

1588
Akiva Lane
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Why did Lucy buy poppies from the florist?

It was Father's Day, and she bought flowers for her pop.

2367
Akiva Lane
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Did Betty know where her lost ring was?

Off hand, she didn't know.

1981
Akiva Lane
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When you put smart technology into a house, what does it become?

Aware house.

152
Akiva Lane
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What did the family call their evening meals at their round dining room table?

The nights of the round table.

2210
Akiva Lane
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When do you tell people what they are?

When you tell them, 'You are welcome'.

1606
Akiva Lane
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When Samantha's parrot flew away, what shape did it remind her of?

Polygon.

457
Akiva Lane
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What is similar about doctors' situations before and after they graduate from medical school?

First they need patience, and then they need patients.

49
Akiva Lane
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What do you call relatives who are sleeping?

Nap kins.

104