Akiva Lane
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What can you say about a manager who enjoys firing people?

That he's playing with fire.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Joe like running at the track?

He felt like he was just running around in circles.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the difference between doing many things at once and being hit by a lot of taxes?

One is multi-tasking, and the other is multi-taxing.

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Akiva Lane
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During negotiations, why did one side suggest that they continue at the local diner?

They wanted to make a counter offer.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Ben wear double-pane eye glasses?

He wanted to four-see what would happen.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Martha carry a small rock with her?

To remind her that sometimes life is hard.

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Akiva Lane
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What song verses appeal to everyone, and where do they teach this?

Uni-verse, taught in a Uni-verse-ity

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Superman's fruit bowl remind him of football?

It was a super bowl.

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Akiva Lane
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What did people call their activity of dashing things over the cliffs onto the rocks 100 yards below?

The hundred yard dash.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Amanda surprised that this perfume was so expensive?

She was told it was worth a red scent.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who is very good at finding things?

Pro found.

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Akiva Lane
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After someone stole Bobby's clothes while he was swimming, did he get home without people seeing him?

Yes, but just barely.

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