How did the young lady feel when her date was rude?

She felt dis-missed.

726

Why did Fred always cut into lines?

Because his doctor said he should lose wait.

1178

Why did Evelyn dislike being near chickens?

Because they used fowl language.

1726

What is the best month to buy and sell jewelry?

Jewel-eye.

1098

What do you call a scientist who measures how big things are?

A size-mologist.

143

What's the advantage of buying eye glasses with frames colored by Rose Jones?

You can see through Rose-colored glasses.

648

What does Shakespeare getting sick have to do with feeling angry at someone?

ILL WILL.

252

Why did the blues band remind Bob of his days hunting whales?

The wailing reminded him of whaling.

1380

What is special about the sentence "See, yes we can!"

It's YES in 4 languages: Spanish, English, French, and Hebrew

2104

What did Alice call the hair she cut off because it was full of knots?

Forget me knots.

2454

How is a meal like archery?

It's best when it hits the spot.

557

What involves getting into the nitty-gritty of what is right and wrong?

Inte-gritty.

685