Akiva Lane
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What did Sylvia say when her lunch fell down a well by mistake?

Oh, well.

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Akiva Lane
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When Stephanie inventeted a way of saying that someone is at the door without ringing a bell, what prize did she win?

The No-Bell prize.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is the 'sea-food' diet so effective?

You see the food, but you don't eat it.

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about a bagel with a very large hole?

It's hole is bigger than the sum of its parts.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill talk about his skin rash?

It was a senstive topic.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who used to be a pert?

An ex-pert.

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Akiva Lane
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What is it called when parents provide good guidance for their children?

Power steering.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jerry expect to hear quacking after the air conditioning repair men left?

They said they were putting in new air conditioning ducks.

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Akiva Lane
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When Ellie Smith married Darth Vader why did she feel things were going up?

She became Ellie Vader.

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Akiva Lane
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What's the motto of a clothing maker that encourages young men to wear vests?

Go vest, young man, go vest.

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Akiva Lane
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When the patient said he had trouble with his memory, how did the doctor respond?

In that case, you pay me up front.

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about someone who thinks he will make a lot of money playing dice?

He's in a fool's para-dice.

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