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Akiva Lane
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What does praying and Swiss cheese have in common?

They are both holy.

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What do you call a scientist whose funding got taken away?

A mad scientist.

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What do lawyers do?

They insert and remove claws in clauses.

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Why in the army do they avoid giving treats twice?

That would involve a re-treat.

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Why did Emma avoid using coins?

She thought they were all two-faced.

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What is it called when people make big letters on the ground?

Typography topography.

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What do palm trees and calendars have in common?

They both have a lot of dates.

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How was Bill's mug shot that was taken when he was arrested by mistake?

The picture didn't do him justice.

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What can be said about someone who buys lots of books but doesn't read them?

The person has no shelf control.

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Though Joe was a great pitcher, why did he insist on playing other positions on the baseball team?

He didn't want to be pitch-in holed.

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What seat lies?

Either 1. deceit or 2. a recliner.

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What kind of doctor is similar to a boring teacher?

An anesthesiologiest - they both put people to sleep.

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