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What do you call someone who measures how much status people have?

A statustician

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What is similar about doctors' situations before and after they graduate from medical school?

First they need patience, and then they need patients.

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What is MOM spelled upside down?

WOW!

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How did the hardware store advertise hammers that break easily?

They are unbeatable.

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What part of the day does not have an odd amount of Ning?

The Even Ning.

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What city is known for being nice?

Nice, France.

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What is similar between the Amazon jungle and tennis?

The Amazon used to have cannibals and tennis has a can of balls.

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Why did Rose like the weekend?

Because the weekdays made her weak, and the weekend made her strong again.

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What happened when the paint Jerry took spilled on his hands?

He was caught red handed.

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How did Bob become a carpenter?

He was an apprentice to a carpenter, and that nailed it.

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What is a room that has mold called?

A mush room.

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Why was Mrs. Jones always looking under her son's bed?

She was hoping that there might be something new under the son.

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