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Why did Arlene bring lipstick and eye shadow to school?

She had a make-up exam.

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In a polarized society, what is the result of discussions between people with opposite views?

What is discussed results in disgust.

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What's another way of saying that it seems that I have 4 pears?

It appears that I have a pair of a pair of pears.

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How do we know that the army of Turkey is brave?

So people know that they are not chicken.

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Why didn't Bill promise his wife that he would be a billionaire?

Because that didn't look very promising.

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When you put chili sauce in the refrigerator in Santiago, what does it become?

Chile chilly chili sauce.

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Why did the prisoner break out of jail?

Because he couldn't finish a sentence.

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Why did the editor wear a sweater?

Because writers sent her many drafts.

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What do you call a delicious English herring?

Yum kippers.

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How did Phil become such an expert at bumper cars?

He took a crash course.

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What was the result that friends Juan and Amal were always together?

When you saw Juan, you saw Amal.

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What special symbol weighs more than any other?

The pound.

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