Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

When the new driver felt he was driving too fast, what was very confusing to him?

He didn't know if he should slow down or slow up.

3146
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What will happen if the San Andreas Fault causes an earthquake?

It will be covered by no-fault insurance.

607
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

If a friend's cousin donates a kidney to his friend's cousin, what does it make the two friends?

Second cousins, once removed.

1810
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why were the vegetables upset when Marty put salt on them?

They felt assaulted.

2907
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did Mrs. Gard call it when she changed her twin babies?

The changing of the Gards.

411
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What can be said about nurses who help patients with intravenous feeding?

Their work is in vein.

65
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why are all fish stores in Finland kosher?

Because they have Finns and scales.

820
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

When Jim forgot to wear his watch, and he was asked what time it is, what did he answer?

Off-hand I can't say.

1165
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Is the legend about how Arthur became king actually true?

Sword of.

331
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did the union leader start ironing his shirt?

Because he didn't want to strike until the iron was hot.

2691
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call someone who is always drinking coffee?

A caf-fiend.

1982
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Are those mooneshiners still in business?

They STILL are.

1787