Pictures:

What are the odds that this man will slim down?

A fat chance.

380

Why are lawyers happy?

Because they're always dealing with parties.

3127

What electronic device is named after an American insect?

USB

608

What do you do when you see waves at a beach?

Wave back.

57

What bread is similar to money that was gotten illegally?

Sour dough.

2983

What does life have in common with arithmetic?

It has its pluses and minuses.

3252

Where do puns come from?

The funny farm

204

Why was Bruce Lee's son always on time?

His first name was "Prompt".

1258

What is this person doing?

He's really using his noodle.

2838

What is a happy insect called?

An uptick.

3135

What is a motto of a podiatrist?

We succeed with de feet.

320

What is it called when a prisoner sends a text message?

Con-text.

1968