Pictures:

What do you call a father from Iceland?

An ice pop.

1736

How did Bill feel after a hard day's work, turning off the light and going to bed?

He was delighted.

2533

How did Billy feel when the cookies got smashed?

He felt crummy.

733

Why does the calendar have a good social life?

It has a lot of dates.

1882

Why was it hard to get things done in the Middle Ages?

Because everything was futile (feudal).

2466

With the rule "I before E except after C', why is the word 'seize' an exception?

Because it is totally made up 'Seize'

2258

Does the manufacturer make much money from selling these?

Nah, they make peanuts.

1338

Why couldn't the koala bear be a doctor?

He wasn't koala-fied.

2552

Why is this wild cat upset?

He was told that cheetahs never prosper.

309

What kind of horse has sore muscles?

Charlie horse.

1713

Why did Billy ask his father to take a baseball bat and a bird to the baseball game?

Because he liked bat man and robin.

536

What does a liquor store have in common with a crowded highway?

They both have bottlenecks.

1848