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What is similar between most men's hair and re-planting a garden?

They are both re-seeding.

430

Why is Joe doing this?

He was told it was important to push the envelope.

2213

Why was Jill relieved after she put the lid back on the peanut butter jar.

Because now it's recovered.

92

Why did the general always have his walking stick with him?

He never made decisions without his staff.

1923

What do you call a broken can opener?

A can't opener.

3145

How is time like an insect?

It tends to creep up on you.

1951

What do people on the Keto Diet use to measure their food intake?

A carburetor

1318

What is a good name for a locksmith that serves food?

Bagels and locks.

886

What happened when the pitcher practicing in the gym threw a ball that hit the fuse box?

It became pitch dark.

2686

If bored people chose a leader, what would the postion be called?

Chairman of the bored.

2092

why did the man make window blinds from potato peels?

He heard they were a nightshade.

373

Why did Debra Smith come up with exactly 1,263 famous idioms?

That's all she wrote.

1791