Pictures:

How did John feel when his alarm clock woke him up?

He found it alarming.

112

What is a good name for a locksmith that serves food?

Bagels and locks.

886

What is this fooseball player in need of?

Plastic Surgery

2001

What starts with P and ends with E and has thousands of letters.

Post Office.

956

What do you call Billy's ability to tease his younger brother?

Expertise.

2946

If you put blue berries deep in the ground, what are they called?

Very buried berries.

2063

What is someone called who sees a crime committed at an Apple store?

An iWitness

1240

Why did Beth wear a blindfold when she slept?

Because her husband was such a light sleeper.

655

What did the seal with the broken arm say to the shark?

Do not consume when seal is broken.

1398

Why didn't the group of doctors sit down?

They didn't want to be sitting docs.

2138

This animal is a practical joker.

He just got his friend's goat.

1282

What city in the universe is where you can get a good education?

Universe City.

2174