Pictures:

What is an imaginary ocean?

A fanta-sea.

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How did President Johnson always know the right thing to say?

A little Birdie told him.

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When the lusion got sick, why wasn the doctor not concerned?

He said it was an ill lusion.

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How are kangaroos and rabbits different than other animals?

They are the most hoppy.

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What is similar between a house of worship and Swiss cheese?

They're both holy.

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What does a lawyer and someone who gave up liquor have it common?

They both passed the bar.

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What 2 letters and 2 numbers mean 'safe dog'?

B9 K9

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What symbol is written before it is pronounced?

The dollar sign.

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What is a pile of cats called?

A meow-ntain

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How did the Head of Engineering at MIT get his job?

By being a roads scholar

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Why do butchers need regular vacations?

To escape the grind.

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When the pessimist says 'It can't get any worse', what does the optimist say?

It can!

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