Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why should we be careful about illusions?

Because it begins with the word 'ill'.

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Akiva Lane
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What is this?

It escapes me.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why was the athlete with a very bad cold very sad?

His nose was running more than he was.

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Akiva Lane
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If something is furbished twice, what does it become?

Refurbished.

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Akiva Lane
General
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What does a penthouse have in common with the lead article in a magazine?

They are both a cover story.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

What spice doesn't need an expiration date?

Thyme.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Rose like the weekend?

Because the weekdays made her weak, and the weekend made her strong again.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

Why didn't the small hotel want to let the motorcycle gang stay there?

The youth hostel didn't want hostile youth.

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Akiva Lane
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Is it good to tie something with a frayed knot?

I'm afraid not.

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Akiva Lane
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What does a law student have in common with someone giving up liquor?

They both want to pass the bar.

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Akiva Lane
General
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Why was Arnold arguing with his stomach?

Because he ate something that didn't agree with him.

2007
Akiva Lane
General
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What are reporters who never retire called?

Permanent press.

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