Pictures:

Why did Oliver sit on a ball in his office?

He wanted to show that he was really on the ball.

1853

What did the man say after a meteor destroyed his house?

This really hit home.

2175

What are reporters who never retire called?

Permanent press.

1581

What is similar between a teenager with a credit card and a rhinoceros?

They are both dangerous when they are charging.

1629

What is the difference between turning on a computer and falling off a log?

One is logging on and the other is logging off.

3265

What is a well after the repairman fixes it?

Well adjusted.

710

What kind of tea always tells the truth?

Honest Tea.

2506

Why did George sell his barber shop?

He found cleaning it to be a hair-raising experience.

871

What 2 letters do you use when talking to someone else about themselves?

UR

2773

What is a good chili recipe?

Go outside without a coat.

1470

What is an expert in making signs called?

A sign-tist.

2423

What happens when a person has to work on Sundays?

It's a weakened weekend.

153