Pictures:

How did Boris feel about losing the kick-boxing championship?

He wanted to kick himself.

785

Why do UN ambassadors stay so healthy?

Diplomatic Immunity

2956

Is basting a real stitch?

Mmm...sew-sew.

2326

What is the motto of the factory that makes canned food?

We can!

2103

After Jim fell into the upholstery machine, what happened to him?

Now he's recovered.

1665

What do you call a plane that is not fancy?

A plain plane.

30

What does this picture represent?

Mind over matter.

723

How did Mark regard his habit of drinking beer every day?

He regarded it as minor ale-ment.

2194

What is it called when the letter E moves slowly?

Creep-E.

2396

How did Joe the boxer feel after being slugged in the face?

He felt very sluggish.

2155

Why did Mr. and Mrs. Beaver find it hard to get along?

Because they found each other so dam a-gnawing.

59

Why did Andrea want to date a writer?

She was looking for Mr. Write.

1179