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What did pregnant Emily and the library book she was reading have in common?

They were both due in September.

1628

When Alan was arrested, why couldn't he accept invitations?

He was fully booked.

1632

What is a tavern called that only serves chocolate liqueur?

A chocolate bar.

2726

If before marriage a man is incomplete, what is he after he gets married?

He's finished.

396

What party did they have in the basement flea-market?

A cellar seller cele-bration.

1584

Why was Billy so fascinated watching the contruction worker?

He found it riveting.

88

Why is "libre" the Latin root for both book and liberty'?

It implies that learning makes us free.

915

What aunt disagrees about everything?

Aunt Tithesis

2368

Why did the weasel go to prison?

The mink stole.

1042

Who was the person mistaken for someone's father?

A faux pa

2261

After being disappointed by the response he got, why did Jim go fishing at lake Excellent?

He was fishing for compliments.

538

Why is a body of water on the moon crazy?

It's a luna sea.

2909