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Shane Ronay
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Why do some people seem to find things out before others?

They're member of the heard.

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Akiva Lane
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Because Gus was always happy, what was his nickname?

Fungus.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call heating oil that you pay for every month?

Term oil.

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Akiva Lane
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Did Betty know where her lost ring was?

Off hand, she didn't know.

1981
Akiva Lane
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When submarines do naval exercises, what are they called?

Sub routines.

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Matt Weiss
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What did the plate say to the food?

The meal is on me.

2050
Akiva Lane
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What's similar between the last stop on a train and a lion's tail?

They are both the end of the lion.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the bad sergeant behave?

He was rotten to the corps.

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Akiva Lane
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What's another way of saying that it seems that I have 4 pears?

It appears that I have a pair of a pair of pears.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Cynthia feel about the fact that pollen counts were low?

She felt that was nothing to sneeze at.

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Akiva Lane
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Why do you really have to hand it to short people?

Because otherwise, they can't reach it themselves.

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Akiva Lane
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When Sharon found an old copy of Crime and Punishment, what was she holding?

A dusty Dostoevsky.

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