Pictures:

Why did the person who smoked too much go to Istanbul on a cold day right after Thanksgiving?

Because he wanted to go cold Turkey.

3197

What does a law student have in common with someone giving up liquor?

They both want to pass the bar.

1856

What did Larry name his new ink and toner business?

Ink, Inc.

415

How did Sarah feel about not getting concert tickets to see her favorite band?

She found it dis-concerting.

157

What is it called when a fusion nuclear reaction starts acting unpredictably?

Con-fusion.

2377

What is the man on the right doing?

Scraping the bottom of the barrel from the top.

1302

What happened when Anne went to the used watch store to fix her watch?

She got a second hand second hand.

2300

What is the result if you combine a sweet pie and a sharp onion?

You get an O-PI-NION that is both sweet and sharp.

1692

What did the waiter say when the customer sent the food back to the kitchen?

Thanks for the feedback.

2385

Why did Bruce breed racing deer?

He wanted to make a fast buck.

1898

What kind of tea commands respect?

Authora tea.

2742

What 5 letter word becomes shorter when you add 2 letters to it?

The word 'short'.

988