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Akiva Lane
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What is up and down at the same time?

When you go to sleep drunk, and feel down when you wake up with a hangover.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Martha love walking on the boardwalk?

She never had a bored walk on the boardwalk.

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Akiva Lane
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What's a religious name for foot doctors?

Ortho Docs.

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Akiva Lane
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In Amanda's school, why didn't the teachers write errors in the margins of the paper?

Because the paper they used had no margin for errors.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the keyboard unhappy?

Because its keys were always depressed.

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Akiva Lane
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What is built into the walls at Microsoft headquarters?

Microsoft windows.

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Akiva Lane
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Since Jill was on a diet, why was she concerned that the math problems on the test were too easy?

Because they were a piece of cake.

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Akiva Lane
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What seeds are named after fathers?

Poppy seeds.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you wake up bread?

You make it rise.

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Akiva Lane
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How is this feeling?

Wheely well.

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Shane Ronay
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What demonstrated Rover's loyalty most?

He'd jump through hoops.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the carpet depressed?

It felt a lack of respect because everyone walked all over it.

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