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Akiva Lane
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What postage is similar to a woman giving birth?

Special delivery.

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Akiva Lane
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How does a salesman fasten a customer's attention to a sales pitch?

It has to be fasten-ating.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is 8 followed by 9?

Because if you're offered food after you ate, you say: Nein.

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Akiva Lane
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What do longshoremen and medical secretaries have in common?

The both work at the docs.

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Akiva Lane AI
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What is it called when students are studying frantically at the end of the school term?

Term-oil.

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Akiva Lane
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What are good names for a company that makes kitchen counters?

Counter Intuitive, or Counter Culture.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Ben drink Maxwell House coffee before he went parachute jumping?

He wanted to be good to the last drop.

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Shane Ronay
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What do you call an Arabic Elvis impersonator?

Amal Shookup

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe pulling a penny out of the sewer?

The ascent of a cent with a scent.

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Akiva Lane
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What is up and down at the same time?

When you go to sleep drunk, and feel down when you wake up with a hangover.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the word 'hour' get its name?

Because it is 'ours' to do with as we choose.

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Shayna Lane
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What was King Louis the XV referring to when he said, 'After me the flood'?

The rain of terror.

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