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Which career works the fewest hours per week?

A Monday morning quarterback.

1265

Which country is most upset about gas-guzzling automobiles?

Mad at gas car

1103

What 2 letters do you use when talking to someone else about themselves?

UR

2773

Why was Fred training male deer to run fast?

To make a fast buck.

2224

Why did Martha lose weight when she ate vegetables?

Because they took away her appetite.

1048

When the Smith family went camping, why did they go in 1 tent or 3 tents, but not 2?

That would be too tense.

2454

What do you get when you find someone you want to marry?

You get married.

319

What is it called when people hold that only their belief system is valid?

Pious bias.

889

What's the most serious bone in the body?

The sternum

1066

What are mens' favorite legume?

Chick peas

683

What part of Queens, New York needs the most water?

Flushing.

2046

What is another name for a florist?

A petal pusher

509