Pictures:

What items does someone most need to weather an emergency?

Staples

294

Why did the man visit his doctor with such tendency?

He had tendonitis.

1070

Why was Bill on the lookout for turnips?

He didn't know when they might turn up.

2745

What device do psychologists use to measure positive emotions?

An Oh!dometer

840

What arm of the octopus is the strongest?

The Arm E.

2706

Why was running to the grocery store not her first run that morning?

She first ran out of milk.

1091

What room grows on a dead tree?

A mushroom.

2556

What do shoes and noses have in common?

They both smell.

1753

How did worms get onto Noah's ark?

They came in pears.

2291

How was the woman able to remember to buy a new pail?

It was on her bucket list.

201

How did Jack refer to the current day when he finished work?

He called it a day.

1214

Why did Sam try to bite a bunch of coins?

He wanted them to become bit coins.

1438