Pictures:

What happened when the oil candle over Bill's bed fell on him while he was sleeping?

He woke up oily in the morning.

2849

What city is named after a saw that is used in battle?

Warsaw

2835

Who owns the largest number of private business aircraft?

King Lear

321

What is it called when you tell something to your grandmother?

Tell a gram.

3381

What's going on here?

The cat is practically out of the bag.

273

What were the Smiths not concerned with?

Keeping up with the Joneses.

214

What day in September do women give birth?

Labor day.

1593

What is the difference between a park and a mental institution?

The park has cycle paths.

1573

What music makes a person feel like a worn out cloth?

Rag time.

2599

What is the coat for an octopus called?

A coat of arms.

3036

What did the midwife say to the woman starting to give birth?

Please bear with me.

1656

What did the miner say when he discovered gold?

It's mine!

2693