Pictures:

What did the midwife say to the woman starting to give birth?

Please bear with me.

1656

What do you get when your optician is a comedian?

A man who makes a spectacle of himself.

1060

When Nancy suggested putting grated cheese on the salad, what was everyone's reaction?

They thought it was grate.

1683

What did the deer in the forest say to the hunter?

I'm game.

2775

What kind of key can make you drunk?

Whiskey.

2961

What kind of pan is very disorganized?

Pan-demonium.

1354

Why did Mrs. Roberts have only large pots in her kitchen?

She was embarrassed to ask a store 'Do you have a little pot?'

2497

When Arnold found a well full of bees, why did he avoid it?

Because he wanted to be well.

1631

What was the animal band on Noah's Ark called?

The Arkistra.

3178

Why do people in the Czech capital feel priviledged?

They're used to their Prague-ative.

2117

Does the manufacturer make much money from selling these?

Nah, they make peanuts.

1338

Why was Bill so exhausted after a day of putting tires on the inner rings of car wheels?

It was tire ring.

3024