Pictures:

Why did the barbershop realize it was a mistake to have two barbershop poles?

People thought it was bi-polar.

2384

What's the advantage of buying eye glasses with frames colored by Rose Jones?

You can see through Rose-colored glasses.

648

It escapes me.

1308

Why was the girl so upset to have to repeat her class?

She felt degraded.

596

What is this man doing?

He's a lion tamer aligning a line of lions.

2856

Why couldn't Joe say the phrase "A cyclone that looks like a tongue."

Because it was a tongue twister.

2821

What is a policeman called when he's sleeping in bed?

An undercover cop.

1747

What did the mountain climber call his memoire?

Cliff's Notes.

3034

Why did Mike lose his job as a masseur?

He rubbed people the wrong way.

574

How does one shorten a coughing fit?

Using a hack

1396

Why did Max pick up his glass of wine?

He wanted to lift his spirits.

516

When the patient said he had trouble with his memory, how did the doctor respond?

In that case, you pay me up front.

1855