Pictures:

What was Bill's reaction when he got hit in the head with a can of soda?

He felt lucky it was a soft drink.

855

Why did the guy from a poor neighborhood study to be a car mechanic?

He wanted to go from under the hood to under the hood.

3195

How did the comb feel after it had its teeth made thinner?

It felt fine.

266

How did Elsie the cow feel when she couldn't give milk?

She felt like an udder failure.

325

How do billboards communicate with each other?

Sign language

206

Why did the father bring a broken cup to the family meal?

He wanted to play good-cup bad-cup with his kids.

677

What did Bob have to decide when someone insulted him before he boarded the plane at the airport?

Fight or flight.

2411

Why did Superman's fruit bowl remind him of football?

It was a super bowl.

1928

What two letters are empty?

MT

849

Why wasn't Alan impressed with the running track inside of the windmill?

It was just run of the mill.

2113

Why was Alan not sure he liked playing trumpet in the band?

Because afterwards he felt like he blew it.

2101

Why did Olivia avoid eating almonds, cashews, and pecans?

Because they were nuts.

1962