Pictures:

What fruit can't get married quickly?

Cantaloupe.

718

Why was Alan not sure he liked playing trumpet in the band?

Because afterwards he felt like he blew it.

2101

What psychiatric tool is similar the noses of hippies?

Hip noses.

1638

What can you say about a broken drinking fountain?

It's out of order and out of water.

2177

What do luggage stores, elephants, cars, and trees have in common?

They all have trunks.

2959

What kind of angle has the most confidence?

A right angle.

2785

What fruit is the favorite of men and women getting to know each other?

Dates.

1171

How are kangaroos and rabbits different than other animals?

They are the most hoppy.

2572

What is an expert commentator about puns?

A pundit.

1228

Why was Jill relieved after she put the lid back on the peanut butter jar.

Because now it's recovered.

92

What has one eye, no mouth, and everyone agrees that it always makes a good point.

A needle.

1591

Why did the factory that made car transmissions have problems?

Because their assembly line was make-shift.

2937