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Why did George make a large model of a dime?

Because he wanted to learn how to fall asleep on a dime.

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Why did the baker receive a list of duties from his boss one at a time?

They were given on a knead to know basis.

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Why did Jim eat steak when he was investing in companies?

Because he wanted a stake in the companies.

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How does a salesman fasten a customer's attention to a sales pitch?

It has to be fasten-ating.

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Why did Arlene buy a rug?

She had some problems that she wanted to sweep under it.

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What do you call a bruise that one gets from falling on Halloween?

A boo-boo.

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What do you call a letter C that does things very well?

Efficient C.

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Where did Maxine put her nail files?

In the filing cabinet.

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What does Shakespeare getting sick have to do with feeling angry at someone?

ILL WILL.

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Why did the general not want to look down at his boots?

He wanted to avoid de feet.

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How are banks like trees?

They both have branches.

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Which type of vehicle transports a person to the doctor when he hurts his foot?

A toe truck.

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