Pictures:

What kind of carrots are worth their weight in gold?

24 karats.

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Is the entire world starting to think exactly the same?

Just the indoctri-nations.

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What does a duck wear to his wedding?

A ducksedo.

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What kind of cats are good at imitating?

Copy cats.

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Why is voting "Nay" more direct than voting Aye"?

It's straight from the horse's mouth.

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Where is the best place to find shipping pallets?

"Skid" row

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What company is similar to how Sammy used to have a rock band?

Sam Sung.

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Why was Alan not sure he liked playing trumpet in the band?

Because afterwards he felt like he blew it.

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My friend stopped working at the chemical factory.

It was a toxic work environment.

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What did Michael Sherlock call the housing development that he built?

Sherlock Homes.

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What do you call a seamstress that doesn't know how to sew?

A seemstress.

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Why did the man buy so much bottled water?

There was a liquidation sale.

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