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What does a cell phone and a gold ring have in common?

They both have a ring tone.

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How do you describe someone who pretends to eat something?

He's ingesting in jest.

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What can be said about nurses who help patients with intravenous feeding?

Their work is in vein.

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What kind of doctor is specifically assigned to you?

Your-ologist.

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What computer activity is similar to buying a new pair of boots?

Re-booting.

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What do you call a seamstress that doesn't know how to sew?

A seemstress.

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How do you describe a water dispenser that is broken?

It's out of order, and it's out of water.

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What is it called when a person gets tired easily from being overweight?

Fatigue.

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What do you call a collie with a flower in its hair and eating melon?

Melancholy Cauliflower

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What do you call ticks that live in a parrot's feathers?

Polly ticks.

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How did Bertha feel about the numbers 3, 5, 7, and 9?

She thought they were odd.

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When the prices of houses go up, why do their roofs get weaker?

Because the prices go through the roof.

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