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How did the writer feel when his books were no longer cited?

He felt ex-cited.

2079

Why don't red and blue get along with each other?

They are on different wavelengths.

526

How does appreciation show one's intelligence?

You're a great fool if your not grate ful.

2243

What do you call having a talent for making fun of others?

Special Tease

349

Why did the scarecrow win a very special award?

Because it was outstanding in its field.

1189

What are axes that are used by criminals called?

Axes of Evil.

3064

What is the origin of the word 'stain'?

It's a spot that is stayin' in the clothes.

141

Why was was it so loud everywhere Tim went?

He liked stealing everyone's thunder.

1320

What happens if certain fowl don't build insulated nests for winter?

They go cold turkey.

1276

Why did the light switch feel ambivalent about the people in the house?

Sometimes it felt turned off.

1936

Why don't matadors take bulls seriously?

Because they know that they are full of bull.

2588

How did Amanda feel about the fact that science doesn't understand why people are ticklish?

She thought it was mys-tickle.

1110