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When Shakespeare had writer's block, what was his motto?

Where there's a Will, there's a way.

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What do taxi companies and computer devices have in common?

They both use drivers.

1939

What is a newspaper that puts you asleep called?

The snooze news.

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What kind of room is a fungus?

A mushroom.

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How did the comb feel after it had its teeth made thinner?

It felt fine.

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What is a father that sells soft-drinks called?

A soda pop.

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What can we drink to get rid of the golden calf within us?

De-calf coffee.

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Why was Emily reluctant to use a tractor on her farm?

Because it didn't attract her.

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Why was running to the grocery store not her first run that morning?

She first ran out of milk.

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What would it be called if you wrapped a city in a big blue blanket?

Rhapsody in Blue.

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What do you usually don't mind losing?

Weight.

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Why did trumpet players in the band feel bad after their performance?

They felt they blew it.

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