Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

After Bob broke his leg, why wasn't he able to control his kids?

Because he couldn't put his foot down.

929
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What's the opposite of a Thanksgiving turkey?

A spring chicken.

1011
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What did the procrastinator tell those who said he'd never get anywhere?

"You just wait!"

2220
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What word means both 'large' and 'disgusting'?

Gross

2627
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did the bear not want to wear shoes?

It couldn't bear not having bare feet.

2692
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why was Jim hesitant about becoming a patient in a mental hosptial?

He wasn't really committed.

3352
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

If there was an earthquake in California, who would be blamed?

People would probably say it was San Andreas fault.

1952
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why are the internal parts of a person called organs?

Because they are very organized.

2972
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why was the farm worker disappointed?

He thought he was promised a good salary, but they gave him a good celery.

1790
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is the difference between starting a new job and eating hotdogs?

With one you try to pass muster, and with the other you pass the mustard.

1887
Matt Weiss
General
Picture

Why can't you trust a staircase?

It is either up to something, or letting you down.

2450
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why was the king nauseous?

Because the people were revolting.

1672